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the ark ...

Posted September 26th, 2012 at 10:05 AM by rabies

The ark

Sunday 11am 9/23/12
There was prayer, then songs. Then we went and sat down..and they began to sing a song that was on my heart for a few weeks… I began to my chair. I saw a golden bar above me. I grabbed ahold if it with both hands as if I was hanging from it. It had 2 rings holding the bar. I tried to pull myself up to see over it. With all my might I couldn’t see. I went to the alter and wept and sat on the stairs..i began to see this bar again. I began to go deep into the spirit praying in the spirit speaking in tongues..i found myself able to get over the bar.
I saw a large wooden box with angels on it..i was able to get up over the bar and I threw myself onto this box. It had golden angels on the ends and I was laid over top of this wooden box that had gold on it. I wept aloud and wailed with grief. As I cried. I was lifted up. The box was opened up to me and I was set inside as a hiding place. And an angel of the Lord hushed me and...
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things I have learned what not to do in life...

Posted September 21st, 2012 at 01:38 PM by rabies
Updated September 22nd, 2012 at 03:26 PM by rabies

dont drink and bravery is involded, jus plain stupid lack of sense and judgement.

dont show off...this ego of yours will try to kill you and embarrass you

fight the laws of nature, sure. but to boldy defy them, your defying the One that created them...jus go buy a casket and put your name on it....some..willingly ask for this though...

in all the accidents, wrecks and horrible things i see. ..its one of the 3.
if its all 3..which iv seen..multiple people die and families are ruined.

at the time its fun. at the time its cool.
but these are serious life rules and laws that cant be broken. breaking more than 1 effects more than jus you and can totaly and completely ruin families/friends/yourself

....and it all happens with the snap of the fingers.....
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reasoning adrenaline from experiences.

Posted September 21st, 2012 at 01:29 PM by rabies
Updated September 22nd, 2012 at 03:28 PM by rabies

i have been on both sides of the fence with the philosophy of the "why and how" of adrenaline.

for preface. i was a small kid. always picked on, cowardly, timid and shy. always feeling like the little runt that will never be as "brave" as those on bikes doing wheeelies in traffic at 150mph...

after high school drugs, drinking, then the army as an 11b,. witnessing/experiencing ieds (roadside bombs) and vbieds (vehicle born) in iraq, watching lots of people die, driving away from mortars screaming down....
after being back things are completely different.
i would look for fights. i would wander into the other lane looking for trouble. always testing the laws of nature.........WHY?
because im stuck in that mode? yes..but its getting much better.
this isnt about PTSD. stay focused.

i thought to myself...have i "obtained" braveness? YAY!! ..maybe not...
maybe i lost something? maybe...
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