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From California to New York (but mostly stuff inbetween)

Posted July 17th, 2013 at 03:45 PM by Jiggles

tl;dr I rode from California to New York. It was fun.

Alright so, there's a lot of **** I wrote about in here, a whole lot. I half expect people to take one look and go **** no! So, here is a time lapse video of the entire trip. All video, err pictures, were taken from the bike, About 40,000 in total all condensed down to less than 4 minutes.

If you only have time to read one post, read day 14, thats a good one

My favorite day of riding was Day 5

Enjoy

Link to original page on YouTube.

Day 1

So the big day is finally here. Time to set out on the trip. I'm all packed up with 5 days of clothes, toiletries, tools, cameras, electronics, earplugs out the ass, and probably some other stuff too. The plan is to ride Mt. Hamilton to Livermore, then head to Sacramento and finally to Lake Tahoe. The traveling party is myself on the BMW K1300S, Brian on a Ninja 250 and Brian's mom and cousin in a Toyota Corolla. They were also heading to New York and were helping transport some of Brians stuff

All packed up and ready to go!



We head out and 10 minutes into the trip Brian lowsided on Mt Hamilton. He overestimated his abilities after being off the bike for a year and ran out of talent mid turn. Fortunately he is ok with just a tiny bit of rash but unfortunately his left blinker is totaled. We were able to salvage it though.

The damage





When we got up to Mt Hamilton we were up in the clouds, not smoke clouds, real ****ing clouds, the **** that murders people with floods. The fog was thick, really thick. The fog would condensate on the trees and water would drip from the trees while the rest of the ground was dry. So the trees were raining. I took a video, it was pretty awesome, sort of like the first time a girl touches your penis.



Our Bikes



We continued on, me leaving Brian behind with my amazing motorcycling skills, I'd turn around just to make sure he hasn't fallen off any cliffs though. We ate at The Junction and then continued on where I gave Jason his sd card back. We headed up to Sacramento and met up with Brian's friend and her mom. They accompanied us to Lake Tahoe.

Junction food, nom nom nom



And omfg the road to Lake Tahoe was ****ing awesome. Even though it was wet there are trees everywhere and it's just so cool. An easy twisty road that allowed me to break 6k rpms (100mph) and have so much fun. I think that's my new favorite road. You want pics right well hold the **** up I ain't got em. (oop now I do!)







We got to our hotel had some food and went to the casino. Our hotel is in California but the casino is in Nevada so we walked across state lines and got some drinks and played some stupid games. It was fun.

At the hotel



Some kinda vegetarian burger or something, it was good!



My Gf made me a good luck charm thing so that she could ride with me and keep me safe I tied it to my bike, should be able to see it in the pic Jason posted. It's on my mirror. It's too bad she didn't make one for Brian he needed it.

Leaving from Jasons place



I told my Gf I'd get her a gift from every state I go to. For California I got her a pillow pet lol. She doesn't read this so I don't mind telling you guys. Well I'm off to bed. We gotta get up early tomorrow like 10am and ride.



Day 2

Route: Tahoe to Winnemuca, NV!

I've perfected a riding posture for freeway riding that I call the captain Morgan. You jut your left leg out and put your left hand on it. I find it to be more comfortable for long boring stuff. Really wish this bike had cruise control

Seems like a lot happened today, lets see if I can remember everything. We did a loop around Tahoe which was ****ing amazing. Damn it's a nice view, that's gna be some prime, time lapse footage. The road was littered with tourists so it wasn't that fun to ride but the view was beautiful. Leaving Tahoe was awesome it was downhill with sweeper after sweeper after sweeper. I worked on my BP for a little bit since it was so awesome. Going uphill would have been more fun but damn, loved it.

Gettin gas in Tahoe



Next stop we were feeling kinda hungry so we decided we'd go eat out.







They wouldn't let us take any pictures inside. They were too expensive for us anyway, even the chick with one arm. Unfortunately nothing looked appetizing so we left and went to Reno where we met up with my mom. She bought us lunch at a Chinese Japanese Thai place which was awesome.

I got super asian with the food pictures on this trip



We then headed over to our final destination and planned to meet up with Teri on the way. Unfortunately Brian's bike decided to not start and we got held up. After some finageling and some calls to the ecotrons guy, we eventually made it to the 80/95 junction and ride 100 miles to winnemuca with Teri. We all got dinner and chilled, it was fun



Teri



Went to a mexican place where brian ordered sangria and received... Soda



Us



Oh yeah we saw a 300 at the bunny ranch lol.

Day 3

Route: Winnemuca, NV to Twin Falls, ID

Fun day! We started off with breakfast at the best restaurant in winnemuca (which isn't saying much) griddles! Brian and I got Benedict's which were delicious then we headed out. We rode on the freeway and then stopped where Brian's bike wouldn't start, woohoo!

Food



And Fail, this puppy was barking at us while we tried to fix the bike.





He got that fixed after half an hour or so and then we headed back to the freeway. Then we ride the freeway some more. And then there was more freeway. Got lunch in Elko at the marchi or w/e saloon. It was pretty damn good.

I learned something today, two things actually. Nevada is hell, where else can you be boiling in the sun AND see snow but have no access to it? That's right, Hell. And number two, after riding today in 95 degree heat for a few hours in all black leather gear I have this to say about people who say its too hot to wear gear. You are all a bunch of pansies.

So then we rode on the freeway some more and then the desert bushes turned into grass and magically we were in Idaho. No helmet laws here! Dunno how people do that, bugs in your face and **** I don't get it.

Oh yeah, in elko This tweaker wanted a ride on my bike. I told her I didn't want my bike to get the herps. She was like c'mon maaaaaan. Uh nah

Lunch!



Dinner!





For my Gf in Nevada I got her a sock monkey and in Idaho I got some fireworks cuz why the **** not!? Tomorrow I'm gna go buy a Roman candle and shoot Brian on the freeway.

Day 4, 5 and 6

Ok so I've got like 3 days to write about haha.

Route: Twin Falls, ID to Idaho Falls, ID

Well day 4 was just highway, that's it, bought 250 miles I think going through Nevada and Idaho. Day Four though we did get some good food from Jakers. Nice restaurant with lots of good beer.



Coconut Shrimp





Beer and Beer Flight!





Day 5

Route: Idaho Falls, ID to Sheridan, WY

Leaving the hotel



hooboy! 450 miles and nearly 10 hours on the bike! What a day! First stop was in Jackson to get some food.

Jackson Cop and part of the Antler Arch



The Bunnery



This is the day we went through Yellowstone. We had to start and end at cities way outside if Yellowstone because the neighboring cities were so expensive. We rode I think 100 miles to get to Grand Teton park and then we rode through there to Yellowstone park. Aside from all the tourists and cars it was pretty awesome.

Riding through





We went and saw old faithful and got to see it erupt. So many ****ing people there. At the Yellowstone park there were a couple old dudes talking to Brian and I about riding. One guy was giving us tips for awesome rodes and beautiful scenery butwe really didn't have time since this was such a long day already. It would have added on another 100 miles or so.

Old Faithful



We left Yellowstone and I started working on hypermiling my K1300S. It was flat and slow so what I would do is accelerate and then pull the clutch in and coast. I continued doing this and the mpg tracker on my bike really like it. For the stint that I did it I averaged like 73mpg. For the whole tank I got 59mpg. Pretty ****ing crazy!

You know how she likes it



Bikes in Yellowstone



We headed to the next town Cody and got food. It was kinda a fancy place. I got wild boar kangaroo and elk meat. All interesting and pretty good.

MOAR FOOD





Normally this would be the end of our day but we still had 160 miles to go to get to Sheridan. I decided to get there as quick as possible. The first 80 miles was straight and flat so I went around 120mph for most of the way. It was cloudy and there were thunderstorms out. The clouds in front of me looked like they were going to start a tornado, there were lower than the rest of the clouds and swirling. The wind was blowing really hard, it's not hard to keep the bike straight but it does strain my neck from all that force. Eventually the road turned and all that wind was pushing my back. I stayed steady on the throttle and the wind pushed me up to 130mph. That's too fast so I dropped it back down to 120mph to be safe.

After 80 miles the straight roadies ended and one of my favorite parts started. The sun was going down and lightning was filling the air when I started on an epic canyon route. My gopro was still in 1 pic every 10 seconds mode and I didn't change it because it was so dark that the pics probably suck. Every minute or so lightning would light up the canyon and let me see briefly ahead of myself. The road was smooth like a race track and technical but predictable. I really wish is gone through during daytime. It was one of my favorite roads ever. Highway 14, go ride it.

As I reached the peak of the mountain I nearly split a deer in half. Dumb duck was just chillin in the road. As I continued I saw more and more deer, that night I probably saw around 50 total. I beeped my horn every couple of seconds which would get them looking at me and then I could see the reflection of their eyes. I had to slowdown so that one wouldn't take me out.

Eventually with like 40 or so miles left to get to Sheridan I reached the backside of the mountain. The ground changed to a red color which I thought was dirt but soon realized no, it's just the road. The backside had these straights followed by switchbacks which were very misleading. The straights easily let you go 60-80mph and then that would duck into a 25mph switchback. And it was a hard 25mph. I couldn't go over 35 through it because it was so tight, other cars on the road were rolling through them at 20mph. Oh and the cars, did a lot of DY passing that night haha.

Eventually got to Sheridan and checked into the hotel, 40 minutes later Brian arrived and I think another half hour or so later the car arrived. I got there at 10:40pm and I was dead tired.
And that was day 5

Some Protein





Day 6

Route: Sheridan, WY to Rapid City, SD

Day six was pretty boring too. 250 miles of freeway yay! I ride these freeways at 100mph. There's no cops and its just real flat and straight and very little traffic.

But today I did have the best burger I've had on this trip so far. It was at Humphrey's bar and grill. I got the guaca guaca burger and **** was it good. Should be pics in the gallery. Huge portions, delicious.





Then after 250mi of freeway we ate at Murphy's bar and grill. A fancier place with rolling leaning chairs to sit in and lots of beer. I got the tommyknocker butt head bock which was so good! I ordered the filet mignon which was so meh. The outside was too black and left a very bitter taste that overpowered the juicy delicious inside.

Shoulda got a burger :/







Day 7

Route: Rapid City, SD to Rapid City, SD lol

Today was a fun day. First we headed to Mt Rushmore to get all presidential and ****. We decided to eat there two, wow, what a ****ing mistake that was. The food was so bad I created an account on yelp and left a bad review. The burger was an overcooked slab of cardboard. McDonald's would have been a major improvement.

The sorry excuse for a burger



Oh wowee!





We decided to split up and ride the twisties around Rushmore.



I tried to split off and go down some trails but when I came back I ended up right behind Brian. It was a touristy area so there wasn't much fun to be had. We took a fun twisty road to a small town called Curtis where I was able to get a monster yum. The. I stopped at a gun knife and switchblade shop and picked up a nice blade for $50.







I took some more secretive back roads back to the hotel that I was able to at least have some fun on. Got back to the hotel and grabbed a beer and chilled for an hour. Then we headed to dinner, a japanaese steakhouse and sushi. It was one where they cook the food in front of you and light **** on fire. The chef threw all of us a piece of broccoli and when he threw it to this younger girl at the table it went straight down her shirt. No idea if did it on purpose.

Dinner! Apparently I forgot to get a pic of the cooked food lol



After that, gokarts. This time I didn't drive like a total pussy. Brian crashed right away and then I ended up lapping him near the end. Forgot the camera oh wells. When we got back to the hotel we set off fireworks in the parking lot. Woots



Average mpgs today was 51mpg close to 200 miles

Day 8 and 9

Route: Rapid City, SD to Sioux Falls, SD

Ok here's a recap of the past two days. We ride on the freeway for about 550miles. It ****ing sucked. So many ****ing bugs everywhere. Everytime I stop I spend 10 minutes cleaning my face shield just so I can see. **** u bitch ass bugs

Got some Ethiopian food in Sioux Falls that you eat with your hands, very good!





Day 9

Route: Sioux Falls, SD to Minneapolis, MN

Todays mileage was about 41mpg for the first highway stint and 50mpg for the second part. All I have to talk about from today is the food places. For lunch we went to elbow room, of which you don't get any. The burgers were cheap and delicious. Best $3 burger I've ever had. It's one of those places where they don't ask you how you want it cooked, they just cook it. If you've ever been to five guys, it was a better version of that, albeit with less condiments and **** to add.

Nom



Then we got to Minneapolis which is a bitch to drive in. Actually all cities are. I hate riding in the city. It is gay. Anyway, we're at a fancy pants hotel for once in the center of downtown. Floor number 12. A big ass mother ****ing bathroom and oddly enough the smallest beds we've had all trip. And no fridge! Wtf!? A (normally) $250 a night place that has no fridge? Ultra gayness...

Anyway we went to dinner at an Irish pub where I got back to my roots with a couple Irish pints. I had sausages and mash and it was delicious.

Dinner!







We decided that after dinner we'd go shopping and hit up a liquor store to get some 2gingers whiskey. Boy was that a mistake. It was a little after seven and everything in this city is closed. Seriously, the mall shut down at like six and so did just about every other shop aside from restaurants. After walking for probably half an hour we found a liquor store and they ID'd on entry lol. Bought some whiskey and a dead guy ale and I headed back to the room to finish the drunken onslaught is started.



Well being drunk makes me hungry so I decided to get room service. **** yeah room service! First place we've been to that had it. I ordered a burger and fries and man was it ****ing good. I was also drunk so everything tastes good but still, totally worth it. We decided to steal the ketchup and salt and pepper shakers cuz they were pretty awesome.





MOAR BEER



And that's it! Yay more freeways today!

Day 10

Route: Minneapolis, MN to Green Bay, WI

Alright so today started out with room service!





Then we rode 100mi to get lunch. Average mpg for that was 52mpg. For lunch at a Norwegian place which was pretty damn good. Then we decided to head out and that's where the fun starts.

Norwegian Burger thingie



We got pulled over on a single lane each way road. The cop was coming at us in a sexy ass charger cop car, he slows down and when we pass he busts a uturn and pulls us over. Soon as I saw the lights I got on the intercom to ask Brian what the speed limit was because I legitematily didn't know, neither did he. Cop gets our information and goes to his car for a good ten minutes. He comes back and says he's giving us a warning and hands us a paper with our information saying we got a warning. I asked him how fast he though we were going and he said 72 (in a 55) and he had it on radar. Apparently he has a cool ass radar system that works while he's driving, pretty badass!



So we got off with a warning and stuck strictly to the speed limit for the rest of the way. I guess I got lucky considering parts of this trip I'd been going 145mph We headed to grenbay and got dinner at a Thai place, pretty good. Not the intended destination but oh well.

Apparently no pictures, oops! I did try a reds apple ale since I've been seeing commercials for it like crazy. It sucks. Tastes like apple juice.

Then we decided to set off all our fireworks. So we found an abandoned looking building and parking lot and started shooting ****. We were out there for about an hour. We decided to wear our motorcycle gear and do silly ****. I ended up burning my held gloves by holding a rocket lol. Oh yeah this is all on video and coming soon.

Link to original page on YouTube.

Then a cop rolls up and gets all our IDs and calls it in. After nothing came back he said he didn't give a **** about fireworks but we were on private property, oops. So we left and now I still have a buncha fireworks left.

Fun day

Day 11

Route: Green Bay, WI to Chicago, IL

Oh previous day where we nearly got arrested and shot by police I managed 55mpg. That's pretty ****ing insane on a 1300cc inline 4 engine. Brian always manages to get better mileage (I do tend to go a lot faster ) he averages about 10mpg more than me and I've got about 150hp on him lmao. So far, even going 120mph I've never managed to get under 40mpg, Brian hasn't gone under 49mpg. I'm very impressed by the mileage I get on this bike, it beats my ninja 1000 by a significant margin and even beat my 650 by a bit while also having more than double the hp. Fantastic bike, except for the overheating

Day uhh, 11 I think. Headed out from Green Bay to Chicago. All freeways so you know, boring! I skipped breakfast cuz I forgot about it and we headed to Milwaukee for lunch. We went to the comet cafe which is a vegetarian vegan place but they also serve meat. I got a mother ****ing big ass ****ing burger and their signature fries. Damn that was good. We also picked up some t shirts since they had a cool design on them.







Still hanging on!



Then we headed to Chicago, I was pretty excited for Chicago, big famous city that I've never been to ya know? It ****ing sucks. This city sucks hairy horse balls. It's ass. Alright lemme being you up to speed. We get into Chicago which is huge and the freeways are at a standstill. It wouldn't be so bad but there is no lame splitting here. What hell, what ****ing hell. I decided to split off the freeway since it was ****ing hot as balls and it wasn't going anywhere. We'd take surface streets to get to the apartment. Well the city streets were only mildly better. Still an assload of traffic jamming **** up. It was so bad my bike actually overheated. The Beamer does not do well in stop n go traffic. It's fine in Cali cuz we can lane split but here **** no. I had to pull over and let the bike cool down so that I could continue on. And then I had to be extra cautious to keep the bike as cool as possible. Speed up, clutch in, turning the bike off while rolling and stopped to prevent extra heating. God it was ****ing hell and it took us over an hour to navigate the 18 miles we needed to go.

Man **** this place.

Also the city looks like ass, like a big **** draining asshole. Downtown isn't so bad, the rest of it can suck on my nuts. The drivers here are terrible too. Multiple times cars would merge into my lane without warning, I couldn't even read their movements. Usually I can anticipate that ****.

So we got to the apartment drenched in sweat and packed all our **** in the house. This place is owned by Brian's landlord and he's letting us use it for two days for free. It's completely unfurnished so we had to go buy beds n stuff.

The neighbors backyard had this makeshift garage



We went to a pizza place and got deep dish heavenly orgasmic pizza. So good, art of pizza I think was the name. ****ing delicious. Enjoy. Like. Then we picked up Brian's uncle at the airport and went to Walmart for supplies. Headed back to the apartment and that was it.





Bed



House



We're not traveling anywhere today, were staying an extra night in Chicago. I'm not getting on my bike today, **** that ****.

I think part of the reason my Beamer overheats is because it has a really small radiator. It's about 20%-25% the size of the ninjettes. It probably helps keep the bike at the right temperature under normal use. As long as I can get moving the bike cools down quickly, it's the stopping and starting that makes it overheat. The ninjette is definitely a superior city bike, but who the **** wants to ride a motorcycle in a city anyway? Even in San Jose it ****ing sucks.

Day 12

Route: ****ing no where

K. Day 12, didn't ride the bike cuz **** Chicago traffic. The traffic never stops there, super gay buttsex. We got Korean tacos for lunch which were ****ing amaze balls and then Korean chicken wings for dinner, also good. Went back to the apartment and started this ******** day.

Food, definitely one of my favorite meals on this trip











Then we walked around for a bit and went to a coffee shop.





We left after a deaf toothless black guy came in complaining about his stomach. The owner called an ambulance and we decided to not stick around to see what happened.

Later we got dinner at a Korean Chicken wing place. These wings were badass





And frozen yogurt for desert.



A ninjette!



Day 13

Route: Chicago, IL to Detroit, MI

Pissed.

Some boring freeway riding to get to Brian's family friends place in Detroit. Lunch was at the crows nest and I had a fantastic burger in Kalamazoo, yea that's the name of the city.



My helmets stupid cocksucking Bluetooth turns off half the time after I turn it on. It turns off while I'm riding too and if you remember the right speaker is also went out a couple days ago. This system was $400. We get to the house and we try to update the pos thinking that might fix it. Nope. Pretty sure a wire is loose because the system doesn't turn on unless its on my head. We try to update it in the computer and when we plug it in it flashes itself and tries to update and fails. Now it doesn't ****ing turn on and doesn't ****ing connect to the computer. ****ig awesome right? Only way to fix it is get a replacement. Too bad I'm in mother ****ing Michigan! Goddamit. God ****ing damnit. **** you cardo. **** you and your shitttttty Bluetooth systems and lack of customer support. Eat my dick. Eat my dick to you choke and throw up and suffocate, **** you.

The house was nice and the backyard, no fences, it was a ****ing park!





Day 14

Route: Detroit, MI to Missisauga, Canada

So I looked up local bmw dealers in Detroit and found one that sells schuberth. I called them up and asked if I could get my src replaced. They said as long as I have the receipt it should be fine. I get there and email the receipt to the guy and he goes and grabs a brand new one for me and installs it. **** yes! He said he'd send back the old one for me. He was gna send it back in the original box so I asked if I could have one of the audio cables and he said sure. If I plug in the audio cable for music it will greatly enhance the battery life of the helmet. So that was awesome and I'm really happy about that.

Then Brian found the go cruise throttle controller things that allow you to have cruise control on your bike. We each picked one up for $20 a piece and installed them on our throttle. Now the boring freeways will suck less since I can take my hand off the throttle and work on steering with no handlebar inputs.

Heading into Canada today, woohoo!

Day 14, it's Canada time!

First off, **** Canada. Yea I said it, **** your leafy flag, **** your understaffed business, **** your unending miles of traffic, **** your bitch ass rain, **** your pussy ass lightning storms, **** your faggoty power grids, **** your $3 toll, **** your one and two dollar coins, **** your couch *****.

Alright, so first off I went to the bmw place and got my schuberth replaced like I said earlier. That was the highlight of the trip. Then we went to sportbiketrackgear's actual shop. It's not as big as you'd think but they are expanding soon. Got a gift there and then we headed for the border.





There was thunder and lightning and it was pretty ****ing cool. We got gas at a gas station before the border because those uppity Canadians like to charge per liter instead of per gallon so you end up paying more. What a stupid idea, liters are for cola you douches.

We go to cross the border and it starts pouring and we were getting soaked. I went through the inspection and handed over my passport and got the green light. Lol they didn't find any of my drugs bahahaha. We went to the currency exchange and put rain gear on. It was still ****ing pouring. Then I got $100 in Canadian money. I guess it's not like Mexico where they accept free American dollars, you have to have socialist money. So I got two fifties out of the machine. These flimsy ass bills felt very fragile compared to my robust and rugged American dollars.

Anyway, we got onto the Canadian highways which are limited to 100 kilometers per hour. What the **** are those anyway? Canadians must be really bad drivers which is why the speed limits are so low. We ride for a long ass time and get to Toronto and Mississauga, holy ****, Canadian ass packing traffic. It's big, it's bad, and it's Canadian. This **** was backed up for miles. So what do the Canadians decide to do? They pull uturns on the highway and go backwards to the exit. What a buncha ****ing ****tards. Why the **** would you do that Canada? So we couldn't get onto this highway cuz the dumb ****sticks going backwards were blocking it so we exit and did surface streets.

Holy **** what a mess. Lights are out and these damn Canadians dunno wtf to do! Treat it like a stop sign you leaf smoking homos, this isn't ****ing Mexico, you are better than that, not by much but a mild margin is better than nothing. Traffic was a bitch. People were even offroading to get off the highway. Uncle ****ers.

We didn't know if lane splitting was legal so I called my Gf via the Rogers network, what a stupid ****ing name for cell service, and asked her to find out. I figured since California and England allow lane splitting and both those places are pretty gay then for sure As gay as Canada is that it would be legal. And it is! So we lane split for a good bit and stopped at an A&W to recalculate. I ordered a burger and fries. It took about 30 Minutes from the moment I walked in to get my food and it wasn't even that busy. They had 2 workers, that's it. Wtf Canada, get some goddamn burger flippers or is the min wage so high you can only afford two!? ****



Then we headed to the hotel. That only took ****ing forever thanks to the ****ing traffic. God I ****ing hate traffic! It was so ****ing bad my bike started overheating IN THE UNCLE ****ING RAIN!!! Holy **** Canada, suck more? Like 5 Canadian hours later we got to the hotel. It was too late to go get food where we wanted so we ate at the hotel. The great North American grill or some **** is what it was called. There was like 2 waiters, one chef and one bar tender. And like ****, 100 customers? There was no hostess. We had to go to a waiter and ask where the **** do we sit. We sat. He didn't come by for our orders for ever so I went to the bar to get beer. What a ****** selection. Jesus ****, step your game up Canada. Got a beer which took a while and went back to the table. Ordered a burger, can't **** that up right Canada?

Wrong. Apparently Canadian cows are meatless pussies so they ran the **** out of burgers. How the **** do you run out of burgers!? I ordered fish and chips, don't **** this **** up bitch. I finished my beer before the food came so I waited for like 10-15 Canadian minutes, and went and got another beer. Wouldn't you know all the draft was out. How the **** do you run out... Oh wait we've been over this. ****ers... The Canadian beer wasn't very good either. I got Blue, it was meh.

Finally after 1.5 beers, the food came.





It was warm, not hot. Upsetting.... The meal was ok. Went back to the room to dry all the Canadian rain out of my gear with a tiny Canadian hair dryer. I started that 3 hours ago, my gloves are almost dry. Found out that the pussy ass lightning storm knocked out power in 80% of Toronto and Mississauga. Wow Canada, way to ****ing fail at life. Also their trains flooded. Bahahaha, pansies.

We did have plans to go into Toronto tomorrow but **** it, this place sucks. Canada can suck on my balls and die.

Average mpg today was 56, pretty legit










Day I don't know anymore.

Route: Missisauga, Canada to Albany, NY

We had a long day ahead of us, Toronto to Albany New York, 400ish miles. We decided to go to the Canadian side of Niagara falls. So we left the hotel and went to get gas. Now considering Canada's ****ups so far this can't go right, right? Right, the gas station was out of gas. The mother ****ing gas station ain't got no mother ****ing gas!! How is this even possible, well let me tell you how. For one, the gas station was located in Canada. That's about it. Stupid.







So we get gas, ERH EXCUSE ME, petrol, ****, and head out. It was like a hundredish miles out from where we were to Niagara Falls. We got there and we're pretty hungry so we took some pics and got some Canada fast food. Can't **** that up right Canada? So close to the border you can't possibly do wrong right? Well my Tim hortons burger was about 50% meat 50% open space. Sigh. At least they had beer, that's neat.





And the falls





We crossed the border and went to a wing place, duffs I believe, it was pretty damn good.





Then headed off to Albany. I practiced no handed steering some more and after a hundred miles we pulled off to get gas and put on rain gear since we got hit by a big ass rain cloud. I bought a monster at the stop for $4.50, I have a problem, I can admit that. Rain gear on and gas filled up we headed out and I began my 200mi journey of no hands.

For this stint I probably did about 150-160 miles no hands with 120mi straight no hands. It was ****ing fun. I blasted music and danced the whole way, people in cars were like Dafuq is this ***** doing. Some bitches took pics too.

We got to Brian's uncles house with about 16 range left on my bike. That means essentially I've got a bought .25 gallons left, so I just barely made it. We did 200mi no stops, I'm impressed that I can do that. Dinner was some reheated food, it was pretty good.

Alright tomorrow is the last day of the trip! It's gna be a total of over 4,500 miles and a few kilometers.

Day 16

Route: Albany, NY to NYC, NY

We had a short ride this day, less than 200mi to get to Brian's place in NYC. I was promised of twisties on the way but that turned out to be false. First we limped to a gas station with probably around 0.25 gallons in my tank and filled up. Then we got lunch at a little sandwich shops and took off.



We got to the twisties and I took off ahead of Brian. It was a 2 lane road and I figured it would eventually turn to one lane and become fun. It never did. I'd describe these twisties as "no-hand twisties" or fasties. And that's how I rode a lot of it, with no hands. This took a lot of concentration and I learned some new aerodynamic steering inputs. Switchbacks, though they were mild, proved to be the most difficult. The bike steers very slowly when you don't use the bars so everything I did had to be though out in advance and planned.

It was tons of fun and I was able to have fun at a much slower speed which also left me a large cushion for mistakes. The road was marked as a 55mph and I was generally doing 65-70. If I was going balls out I'd feel comfortable doing 80-100 on it so going 65-70 was much safer, even without hands.

Link to original page on YouTube.

We got to Harlem and unpacked and parked the bikes. Then of course it was time for food. We went to a Korean chicken wing place and got some excellent wings and a sushi roll thingie.







Then we met up with two of Brian's friends, clover and Amelia, and proceeded to get **** faced at a sake bar, hence the $225 bill.







Raw Octopus!





I knew I liked these girls and that it was going to be a good night when (after a couple drinks) Amelia began a story with "So I was taking a **** on the toilet" The sake was fantastic, I guess we all tried a lot of high end stuff and there may have been a slight drinking contest between the people who don't pass out after 3 drinks Oh yea, we got raw octopus, it was pretty strange. Good but very strange, not sure I'd order it again. The night ended stumbling drunk through New York City.

Day 17

I woke up slightly hungover from the previous night, as did Brian. He brought us some food truck chicken over rice that was ****ing amazing. We lounged around the apartment for a good chunk of the day and I reorganized my **** for shipping the motorcycle back. Some of my stuff is going on the bike (illegal stuff ) and the rest will go on the plane with me.



We left the apartment in the late afternoon to go gift shopping for my family. Walked around NYC for probably 2-3 hours and got Japadog in the middle of that. Japadog is ****ing amazing, fantastic food for a low ass ****ing price. Big to them.



I ended up getting my dad a flask with a built in collapsible shot, my eldest brother a fancy pants bottle opening thing, my other older brother a I <3 NY tshirt because that is the stupid ****ing ****** gift he asked for and my youngest sister a spray paint street painting. I was really impressed as I watched the guy make it and decided to get that. Super touristy but idgaf! Suck it. Btw, I got super ****ing ripped off on the tshirt. First stand I saw I stopped and got one for $10. A tshirt for $10 sounds like a regular price to me. Well a block away a store was selling 4 I <3 shirts for $11. I was like aw ****, for a dollar more I coulda got 3 more shirts! Balls.

Saw a cool jap bike



Btw I still have to get my mom and my older sister something. Any ideas? Sister likes owls and asked for a cool magnet. Also I want to get my brother something else besides this gay tshirt, thoughts?

Dropped all my **** off at the apartment and we proceeded to a bar where Amelia bar tends. We were greeted with shots of patron and then received free alcohol for the rest of the night. Also, she gave me a free monster!

Our lovely bartender



Started going a little crazy...



Free monster!





After we had our fill of alcohol, (I think Brian made it to two drinks), we went to the other bar that Amelia works at which also serves food. So we got more food and then another round of shots. Pro tip, when you get free drinks tip heavily!

Clover and her bf



free food



Brian licked the bowl clean



After that, went back home and passed out drunk.

New York City, I could see living here. The city would help make up for the lack of fun riding. I wouldn't want to move here but if there was a job opportunity or something then I could see that happening.

Chicago can suck on my nuts and Toronto can lick my asshole

The next two days we took it easy and I gift shopped some more. We got some harlem soul food for breakfast.



And OMG New York pizza is amazing!



Saturday Night I flew home to San Jose. I had a talkative neighbor on the plane who I thought would keep me entertained throughout but she ended up passing out before the plane even took off. I got home and was greeted by my gf at the airport who made a sign for me. Her charm kept me safe and hopefully its keeping my bike safe in Harlem as it is STILL waiting to be picked up by the shipping company.

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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    LittleRedNinjette's Avatar
    So when are you getting the movie deal??
    Posted July 17th, 2013 at 05:46 PM by LittleRedNinjette LittleRedNinjette is offline

  2. Old Comment
    Jiggles's Avatar
    Movie deal?
    Posted July 17th, 2013 at 06:03 PM by Jiggles Jiggles is offline
  3. Old Comment
    LittleRedNinjette's Avatar
    Sure, why not? This sounds much more entertaining then half the crap they put out.
    Posted July 18th, 2013 at 03:00 AM by LittleRedNinjette LittleRedNinjette is offline
 

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