[Gregular]

This is the oldest joke I know, for some reason it's stuck in my noggin when not much else would

The joke does contain religious figureheads, but just uses them for a story, it's not meant to offend anyone. It's just a joke, but in today's climate where religion is such a hot topic and political correctness has sometimes gone mad, I can never be sure. And this forum does have an international audience. I certainly don't see it that way and don't intend to offend anyone.

One day, the Pope of Rome decrees that he wants all the Jews to leave, "They have to go. I've made up my mind"

But even the Catholics think this is wrong and there is a big uproar in the streets. So much so that the Pope buckles and agrees to a silent religious contest between himself and a chosen representative for the Jews.

If the Pope wins (which everyone expects - he is the Pope after all), the Jews have to leave.. If the Rabbi wins then the Jews can happily stay.

So on the chosen day, at the chosen hour.... they meet. The Pope and Rabbi Yoshi on behalf of the Jews.
There's huge gathering to watch events unfold and you could hear a pin drop as the Pope steps up to the plate. There's a wave of silence and expectancy.

The Pope stands tall and proud. And for his first argument he holds aloft 3 upright ringers.
The crowd trembles with anticipation... what will the Rabbi do?
Rabbi Yoshi looks angrily around and steps up, fiercely points with 1 finger.

The Pope seems surprised by this as if struck by an invisible blow, he hastily draws a circle around his his head.
The Rabbi is quick to follow... shaking his head he points firmly and repeatedly taps the ground.

Again the Pope recoils and in a last resort snaps a wafer and takes a sip of wine.
Now it's the Rabbi's turn to look confused and after a minute of rummaging, pulls out an apple and takes a bite.

"That's it!" the Pope shouts out, drawing the debate to an end and admits defeat. "The Rabbi has bested me, the Jews can stay"

There's alot of murmuring amongst both sides of the crowd and they hastily gather around their leaders to find out what happened.

The Catholics are in disbelief, "You're the Pope! How can you loose?"
The Pope shrugs unknowingly, "He was too good. He had an answer of for everything."
"First off, I tried to remind him of the Holy Trinity, but straight away he came back with, there's 1 common God. Brilliant!"
"Then I tried to answer that God is all around us, but again he bested me and reaffirmed that more importantly he's here with us right now. What could I do against that?"
"So lastly I produced the wafer and wine to show the he absolves us of our sins, and what does the Rabbi do...... he produces the apple. The original sin!"
"I could not do any more. The Rabbis was brilliant and the Jews can stay."

Meanwhile the Jews have gathered around the Rabbi and there is a different feeling amongst the crowd. "Well done Rabbi, you pulled that one out the bag! How'd you beat the Pope?"
"Well," replies the Rabbi, "I'm not entirely sure..."
"First off, he says we got 3 days to go, so I gave him the finger and says you can **** right off."
"Then he waves around his head, saying we can be anywhere but here. I'm like no way mate and point to the ground. Us Jews are staying right here!"
"And then I dunno what happened. I think we broke for lunch!"