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5jckr-3691210218@sale.craigslist.org [?] flag [?] : miscategorized prohibited spam best of Posted: 2013-03-19, 2:02PM EDT
A 2009 Kawasaki Ninja 650: A Play in One Act - $4400 (North Bethesda)
A 2009 Kawasaki Ninja 650
A play in one act.
Cast:
The Seller
An Anthropomorphized Craigslist
A 2009 Kawasaki Ninja 650 motorcycle
Scene 1:
Setting: A generic office in a generic office building, in the middle of I-270's technology corridor.
*knocks*
*Seller opens door*
Seller: "Hi Craigslist, thanks for coming to see me. Have a seat."
Craigslist: "Glad to be here, what can I do for you?" *sits down*
Seller: "Well, Craigslist, see, I've got a problem. I've got this here motorcycle I'm trying to sell."
Craigslist: "Great, that's what I do. Why are you selling it?"
Seller: "Whoa, now that I hear you say that, I think I spoke too fast. I'm not trying to sell, sell it."
Craigslist: *looks confused* "Huh what? What are you trying to do then, and why did you need to see me?"
Seller: "Selling implies trying to get rid of something for money. That's not what I'm doing here. I want this bike to go to the right person, for the right reasons. It's not like I'm choosing to let the bike go."
Craigslist: "huh.. well... having me here is a voluntary thing.... not sure I'm forcing you into this."
Seller: "No, I'm forcing myself. See, I'm getting older, there are going to be kids in my life soon, the traffic here... man, it's trying to kill me. It's just not right anymore. The bike knows it, I know it, it's just time."
Craigslist: "I see, so your reasons are personal, makes sense to me! Okay, let's just get right to it then, how much do you want for it?"
Seller: "$4600."
Craigslist: "HA! That's a good one!" *Laughs heartily* "You're kidding right? For a four-year-old bike?!"
Seller: *not amused* "Yup. What's wrong with that price?"
Craigslist: "Oh, let me count the ways." *continues through laughter* "It's a four year old bike and who knows whats happened to it. I know my bikes and this is not a GSXR or a R6. Might not appeal to the supersport crowd, you know. Not to mention that Kelly Blue Book has the bike at $4300 in excellent condition and the NADA Guide has the low-end average retail at $3800! You're crazy man, you know that?"
Seller: "Maybe so, but you haven't seen this bike."
Craigslist: "Well, of course I have.. it's been sitting in the corner right there." *points*
Ninja 650: "Yup, I've been here the whole time, thanks for noticing, guys."
Seller: "Okay, okay, you're right, $4600 is a bit optimistic. $4400 then."
Craigslist: "Man, I wouldn't pay that if my pants were on fire, and only GIVING YOU MONEY WOULD PUT THE FIRE OUT."
Seller: "Okay, Okay.I know you're in this for a deal, Craigslist, and I want you to have a deal. But, I'm pretty serious when I say that $4400 is a deal for this bike. I paid over $7000 for it new. I mean, seriously, look at the odometer. 2265 miles. That's it. A bike at this age would have double the mileage on average."
Craigslist: "what, you didn't ride it that much?"
Seller: "No, I couldn't ride it in the winters up in Massachusetts. And our riding season was only a few months. Just enough for a couple of hundred miles a year."
Craigslist. "and you rode it down from Massachusetts then?"
Seller: "Nope, I transported it on a trailer."
Craigslist: "So what justifies asking just slightly less than what a dealer would charge?"
Seller: "Just look at it... look at the condition... no dings, no drops, no damage. Stored safely out of the elements during winters. Always maintained, look, I have all the maintenance records right here." *pulls out multiple folders full of paper* "I looked after this bike, I loved it and cared for it, nurtured it."
Craigslist: "ummm. that's a little weird, man."
Seller: "you would be too if you lived in Massachusetts for as long as I did."
Craigslist: "okay, I see that you're serious. You know I can't give you what you're asking for it though."
Seller: "That's fine too, make me an offer then."
Craigslist: "I'll have to think on it."
Seller: *Stands* "Great. Come see me when you're ready."
Craigslist: "You bet."
*Craigslist exits"
Ninja 650: *looks hurt* "You really gonna sell me, man?"
Seller: "We'll see, motorcycle, we shall see..."
Location: North Bethesda
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Posting ID: 3691210218 Posted: 2013-03-19, 2:02PM EDT email to a friend
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