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Try going to a class and just watching them. Seeing the drills from the sidelines might help. You could even record the drills.
This includes the OMRL race on Aug. 5th (Sunday), come and watch some of the riders. You would be amazed at what you might learn from observing in person, you could also ask questions and meet some friendly faces.
Same as any track day... Just go watch and get to know some of the riders, you never know who might be close to you or who might help.
Don't give up, and don't give in to your condition. Once You get through you will learn, it will be the most relaxing thing you can do.
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