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Originally Posted by revstriker
But I disagree with you wanting to point your finger at the lady's family. It is no more their fault than it is your fault.
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I disagree. It is absolutely more their fault. We are the ones who are closest to our own family, and the most likely to have an ability to effect change. It's hard dealing with elderly parents or grandparents, but if you don't step in, who will? Is it too late when they've already killed other people on the road? Yup.
The AARP has some links on how to deal with drivers who should no longer be on the road:
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How to get them to stop
If you feel strongly that your parent cannot drive safely, you have little choice but to get them to stop driving. If they agree without an argument, wonderful. If not, you have several options:
•Stage an intervention. This approach, commonly used with substance abusers, involves confronting the elderly driver as a group of concerned caregivers. The group should include family members, health care workers and anyone else respected by the senior. The intervention needs to be handled firmly but with compassion in order to break through the senior's denial of the issue.
•Contact the local Department of Motor Vehicles and report your concerns. Depending upon state regulations and your senior's disabilities, it may be illegal for them to continue to drive. The DMV may do nothing more than send a letter, but this might help convince your parent to stop.
•Take the keys, disable the car or move it to a location beyond the elderly person's control. Leave the headlights on all night or disconnect the battery to disable the car. But if your loved one is likely to call AAA or a mechanic, you have no choice but to eliminate all access to the car. While this may seem extreme, it can save the lives of seniors, other drivers and pedestrians.
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Here's another decent resource on Senior Driving on the California DMV site:
link
They make it clear
here of the ways that a Re-examination can be triggered, and one of them is simply a letter from a concerned family member.