September 14th, 2009, 06:37 AM | #81 |
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Name: Z
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I think the bottom line is that you are not currently independent of her. You aren't in your own place, and your aren't supporting yourself. Should you become horribly maimed, I'm guessing it is she that will have to deal with it both emotionally and financially.
If you have to ask, the answer is no. |
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September 14th, 2009, 10:37 AM | #82 |
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Name: Michelle
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My mom doesn't know about my bike... and I've had it for a year now. However, I'm financially independent and live under my own roof.
Whenever she comes over to visit, my bike is in plain sight, but she just assumes it belongs to my boyfriend. So really, I never lied to her... I just haven't mentioned the topic, and she's never asked any questions |
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September 14th, 2009, 01:12 PM | #83 | |
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September 14th, 2009, 02:01 PM | #84 |
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I can't tell *you* what to do, because I doubt we have all the information about the situation...
But, here's what *I* would do. While under her roof, I wouldn't by the bike. But, I'd start shopping around for my own place and make sure she's knows I'm shopping around. Also, I'd start buying gear. She said no bike, but she didn't say no gear, right? I'd also make it clear that I'm shopping around for my own place and buying gear because I respect her rules, but I am getting a bike... Honestly, it sounds like having your own place would be a good growing experience for both of you. Also, I'm spoiled. I didn't get a bike until I was 30. I told my wife I wanted a bike and she said "NO!... Unless I get one too!" My Dad just started riding, so that's been a lot of fun helping him pick out and work on his bike. |
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September 14th, 2009, 02:08 PM | #85 | |
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I understand what you mean. It would be pretty harsh I would be pissed and I bet can see how you wouldnt look at someone the same way.
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September 14th, 2009, 02:14 PM | #86 |
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September 14th, 2009, 03:19 PM | #87 | |
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September 15th, 2009, 06:48 AM | #88 | |
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Theres the answer : )
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September 15th, 2009, 09:02 AM | #89 | |
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Honestly, I think your answer about moving out also answered your question about getting the bike. Maybe you need to re-evaluate your priorities... I know I have to from time to time... |
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September 15th, 2009, 09:46 AM | #90 | |
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September 15th, 2009, 09:58 AM | #91 | |
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September 15th, 2009, 10:00 AM | #92 | |
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September 15th, 2009, 10:02 AM | #93 |
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as a kid i always wanted a bb gun. my mother wouldn't let me have one, but she did by me a bow and arrow. man that thing would shoot right throught the metal trashcans and side of the shed. not to mention me and my friends shooting that thing straight up in the air. maybe that bb gun would have been a better choice.
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September 15th, 2009, 03:21 PM | #94 | |
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September 15th, 2009, 03:30 PM | #95 | |
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Many people move out of their parents house when they are 18. I would venture to say that most of them survive. And many of them are probably better people for the experience. I certainly am. Man I was such a dick when I was 18. |
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September 15th, 2009, 07:23 PM | #96 |
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no trust me dude, these girls were raunchy...they were both huge and the fridge was stacked with ice cream all the time be glad there are no pix
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September 15th, 2009, 07:24 PM | #97 |
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lol
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September 15th, 2009, 07:25 PM | #98 | |
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Using my buddes experience as a reason not to move....Yeah because I didnt say **** about money or anything, How much did you pay for an apartment? You didnt have roomates? How did you afford college and a appartment at the same time? Did you go to college?
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September 15th, 2009, 07:27 PM | #99 | |
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You didn't bother to address my financial aspects of moving out.
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September 15th, 2009, 07:44 PM | #100 |
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What is there to address? What you've said is that you can't survive without someone else paying for you. Nothing wrong with that, as many teenagers, even those 18+, are certainly in the same boat and hope their parental units will continue to provide a tremendous amount of support. Including picking up a chunk of that $23K/year you list as college expenses.
What you don't seem to be grasping, is that you have no inalienable right to force her to pay for you to do just about anything at this point. Either you can be self-sufficient, or you can't. Binary. If you can't be self-sufficient, then you pretty much have to agree to her conditions for that financial support. Either explicitly or implicitly. Trying to game the system just isn't going to work. You don't have a right to a bike. You don't have a right to college. You don't have a right to much more than life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness like the rest of us. I think you're going to look back at this thread in a few years and feel a bit differently than you seem to be expressing so far.
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September 15th, 2009, 07:49 PM | #101 | |
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If you can afford a bike at home, you can afford to move out and live by your own rules. Maybe that includes getting a bike. Maybe not. I think the bigger issue here then the bike is you wanting to break your mom's rules. When I finally decided I wanted I bike, I had to save up for 3 years, just to get a 250. It's hard. But I think I appreciate it more. And, I was living with my wife (then girlfriend). It's not much more expensive to live WITH someone then to live alone. That's why people have room mates. It gives you more money to play with while getting started on your own. But, you seem like you've already decided that all room mates are bad. So, I guess that's not an option for you. Too bad, because you could probably have the bike and not break your Mom's rules. |
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September 16th, 2009, 02:34 PM | #102 | |
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1. $400 a month. Two Bed Rooms Full Kitchen and Bathroom big enough for a wash n dryer. 2. One, my wife but she didn't contribute financially. Only in the bed room. 3. Football Scholarship 4. Yes
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September 16th, 2009, 02:48 PM | #103 |
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I'm highjacking too, since I'm sick of people who don't work through college, because Mommy and Daddy pay for it. I never received a single cent towards college from my folks. I managed to work a full-time job and even an occational additional part-time job the entire time I have been at school. I payed my own rent now have my own home with mortgage and my own tuition. I bought my own cars/bike. I have a wife and daughter and I will be finishing my BA in December this year.
Throughout my time at University, I have grown sick an tired of people in my classes who have absolutely no responsibility because Mom and Dad pay, and they still can't seem to get to class on time or turn in their work on time. Become indipendent and apply for a Grant for help. So I'm answering the Damn questions too. 1. Apartment = $600/month... House $1,150 first and $300 second mortgage. 2. In the Apartment=No. I have a Family now. Been married 4.5 years and my daughter is 2. 3. Worked my ass off. Pell grants for tuition. 4. Yes.
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September 16th, 2009, 03:39 PM | #104 |
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So I don't have much time to read the whole thread but here is my story.
Since I was young, I have always wanted to ride a motorcycle. No one in my family and extended family have ever ridden one. I confronted my parents I wanted to ride a motorcycle just about the time I already had my drivers license (16). When I asked them, it would always just be the answer of: "It is to dangerous even if you are safe, other people are not." I wouldn't bring the question up until I was 18, 20 and now 21. I am a full time student at a uni and just recently brought the question back up (since I still live under their roof with their rules, but I do work to pay my own tuition/books and can buy my own bike). I told them I do intend to buy a bike the moment I move out and really tried to educate my parents of the precautions I am taking to become a safe rider. My parents finally agreed saying I did handle the entire thing maturely and knew I was going to get one eventually regardless. I would say hold out on the bike whether you move out or stay living with your mom till you, yourself, are fully independent, then your mom has really nothing else to say. |
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September 16th, 2009, 04:16 PM | #105 | |
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preety much the same thing i have done
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September 18th, 2009, 08:44 AM | #106 | |
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September 18th, 2009, 10:53 AM | #107 |
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September 18th, 2009, 11:03 AM | #108 |
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I'm guessing it might be because, based on what I've read in this thread, patience is not a big part of the picture here.
It's funny. I know I was impatient at that age, though I don't recall being THAT impatient. Now that I'm on the wrong side of the half-century mark waiting for things is simply not a problem. With age comes the long view, I suppose. Over time I've become increasingly aware that many people seem to be unable to think beyond the end of the week. Some can't seem to think beyond the end of the day. |
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September 18th, 2009, 11:46 AM | #109 | |
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Intuitive Sliders, Aftermarket pegs, Custom Paint, Seat Cowl, Tinted Screen, Aftermarket flush mounts, Wheel Tape, Fender Chopped, Stock Shortie Exhaust and Woodcraft ClipOns |
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September 18th, 2009, 01:08 PM | #110 |
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Left home at 17 and worked as a mechanic`s assistant for a year--no car--took a bus to work. At 18, I changed jobs--worked at an MC Shop as a mechanic/trainee. Enrolled at a Community College and attended night classes with some very motivated adults. Got a two year degree. Decided to play "Draft roulette"--classified 1-A, and work full time at the bike shop--got a good raise, save for college. My apartment cost $25 a week (a real dump). Went to the university for one year (got a 2-S deferrment). During that time you HAD to maintain a 3.0 GPA or better--or be drafted. I got a 3.7 going to college full time and working 20 hours a week at the bike shop. I did buy a very used 250 for transportation. The next year I again played draft roulette and worked full time at the bike shop. College year four was a repeat--going to school full time, and working part time. I graduated with a degree in English Lit. Summa Cum Laude. That fall, I made good on my obligation, and joined the Army. Did four years in the Army--one year recouperating from being on the wrong side of an AK-47. When I got out. it was Deja-vu. The GI bill paid 1/4 of the tuition--including living expenses--so I had to work. The GI Bill also only paid if you attended full time. I had an 80 Credit Hour degree ahead of me for $400 a credit hour--a lot of money then. Got a job as an orderly at a State Mental Hospital working from midnight to eight. I again lived in a dump and drove a 12 year old Dodge Dart rust bucket. Three years later I graduated second in my class with an MSW, specializing in Gerontology. When I got my degree, I got promoted to an entry level Social Worker and spent the next 20 years working at the hospital. I also worked at the ER three evenings a week and weekends. Trust me, going to college, living on your own, and working, is not a "piece of cake", but does require some maturity and some belt tightening. No,you won`t be driving a Corvette, live in a luxury town house, have your Ninja, and have your tuition and books paid for. In order to do that, you will have to win the Lottery. There ain`t such a thing as a free lunch. I saved my money and bought into the motorcycle shop. We did very well and I "graduated" into the middle class. It took a while, but I was patient. I also became very resiliant.
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September 18th, 2009, 01:50 PM | #111 |
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Did I miss the correct answer, which is "Yeah, you can totally pull it off, just don't let her see the bike. Everything will be cool at home, AND you can have the motorcycle." Which is obviously the only answer the OP was looking for.
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September 18th, 2009, 01:56 PM | #112 |
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James, I don`t know how many people are on this forum....but if EVERYBODY weighs in on this thread, we might have a shot for a Guiness record for the longest thread.
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September 18th, 2009, 01:56 PM | #113 | |
Cat herder
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Quote:
Sounds like one of these about to happen. |
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September 18th, 2009, 01:59 PM | #114 |
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About to happen? Apologies, I thought the train jumped the tracks somewhere around the bend of page 3.
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September 18th, 2009, 02:14 PM | #115 |
Cat herder
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The thread may have, but he hasn't bought the bike or moved out yet, right?
He's going to do what he's going to do. He asked for opinions and has gotten plenty of them. If he's like most of us, he'll give the ones that say what he wants to hear greater weight and discount the rest. That's just human nature. What would be really interesting is to hear back from him in a year or so with a follow-up so we can see what came of all this. |
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September 18th, 2009, 09:07 PM | #116 |
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Its like the line in the Rush song "he's old enough to know whats right and young enough not to choose it"
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September 18th, 2009, 10:26 PM | #117 |
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I think this is really an issue of character, not motorcycles.
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September 19th, 2009, 09:27 AM | #118 |
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September 19th, 2009, 10:16 PM | #120 | |
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Quote:
I'll also add that your family friend that is willing to store the bike for you, should really stay out of it. When your mom finds out... and believe me she will... they will be toast. Then YOU'LL be toast Really, you think you can't wait... you have all the excitement and anticipation built up... but you can wait |
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