The most interesting rider in the world

adouglas · March 4th, 2014, 07:27 AM

His knees have adjustable compression and rebound damping.

He was ATGATT in the womb.

His fingers are pre-curved.

His skull is SNELL M2010, ECE 22.5 and DOT rated.

He rolls the throttle on smoothly and continuously throughout the remainder of life.

He achieves lean angles greater than 90 degrees.

He convinced Harley-Davidson that V-twins are a bad idea.

His knee pucks are worn down from the inside.

His palms have Kevlar schaphoid protectors.

His eyes are Pinlock-ready.

His pajamas have a built-in Level 2 back protector.

His motorcycle wheelies before he turns the key.

When he lowsides, his bike stands back up out of respect.

He counter-countersteers.

His race number is divisible by zero.

He can look through the turn he just completed.

He warms his tires by breathing on them.

His bike has a no-sided swingarm.

The fly on his trousers is safety wired.

Your turn....

misfitsailor · March 4th, 2014, 10:36 AM

This sounds a lot like Chuck Norris to me...

alex.s · March 4th, 2014, 11:42 AM

He rides side-saddle while smoking a pipe and reading a newspaper. Without cruise control.

subxero · March 4th, 2014, 11:51 AM

He inadvertently invented the sport of motorcycle gymkhana one day when trying not to ride over any cracks in the road

alex.s · March 4th, 2014, 12:01 PM

Once while he was smuggling gin, the police managed to pop two of his tires. not to be bested, he balanced the car on the remaining two wheels and completed the smuggle ahead of schedule. After seeing the effectiveness of two wheels, he invented the motorcycle.

subxero · March 4th, 2014, 01:08 PM

He once entered a TT race as an Indie by mistake as he mistook it for a leisure group ride meet up he had signed up for. He went on to win on stock IRCs

CC Cowboy · March 4th, 2014, 02:32 PM

I've seen that guy before. Isn't he from Vermont?

dcj13 · March 4th, 2014, 03:26 PM

"I don't always ride bikes, but when I do, I prefer BMW."

adouglas · March 4th, 2014, 04:29 PM

He is so cool his leathers need no perforation.

Ducati999 · March 4th, 2014, 05:39 PM

He is the model they used for the guy on top of the first place trophy!

dcj13 · March 4th, 2014, 06:04 PM

He kickstarts his bike with the flick of his wrist.

Fun thread! The New Yorker magazine had an an interesting article about the guy 3 years ago (not the most interesting article in the world, mind you): He's just a nice, kind of funny jewish guy from New York (maybe it was New Jersey... Damn it! Can't remember).

misfitsailor · March 4th, 2014, 07:40 PM

In his spare time, he gives riding lessons to Keith Code.

adouglas · March 4th, 2014, 08:18 PM

When he hangs off, it's with three butt cheeks.

adouglas · March 4th, 2014, 08:24 PM

He won the Dakar. On a Hayabusa.

adouglas · March 4th, 2014, 08:25 PM

He requires 150 octane.

adouglas · March 4th, 2014, 08:25 PM

He flosses with safety wire.

adouglas · March 4th, 2014, 08:26 PM

Rossi calls him "The Doctor."

rasta · March 4th, 2014, 10:56 PM

He rides pillion...by himself

He has never stalled a bike, but bikes have been too scared to move

adouglas · March 5th, 2014, 10:10 AM

The Isle of Man is named for him.

rasta · March 5th, 2014, 08:52 PM

He really does wheelie to safety

adouglas · March 6th, 2014, 05:59 AM

The patch on his vest says 0.0000000000000000001%

adouglas · March 6th, 2014, 08:40 AM

His bicycle has a slipper clutch.

Ducati999 · March 6th, 2014, 08:49 AM

He rode the Baja 1000 just for the time in the sun!

Ducati named the Diavel after him

Ducati999 · March 6th, 2014, 08:50 AM

Even his underwear is carbon fibre

Ducati999 · March 6th, 2014, 08:59 AM

In a race the pace car follows him

adouglas · March 6th, 2014, 12:56 PM

His burnouts are classified "five alarms."

adouglas · March 6th, 2014, 12:57 PM

He carved the canyons in the first place.

250rr · March 6th, 2014, 01:09 PM

His cage is an actual cage.

subxero · March 6th, 2014, 01:22 PM

He won the 24hr Le Mans in 2 hours, 57 minutes and 33 seconds

adouglas · March 6th, 2014, 02:28 PM

He is homologated.

dcj13 · March 6th, 2014, 02:31 PM

GPS asks him for directions.

adouglas · March 8th, 2014, 06:21 AM

He wins track days.

misfitsailor · March 8th, 2014, 10:30 AM

He can do a wheelie on a unicycle!

misfitsailor · March 8th, 2014, 10:42 AM

When he races he doesn't win, he just allows you to lose.

adouglas · March 8th, 2014, 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by misfitsailor

When he races he doesn't win, he just allows you to lose.

Ducati999 · March 8th, 2014, 03:50 PM

He uses his own skin for Leathers

adouglas · March 10th, 2014, 05:06 AM

Hie rides gymkhana. Backwards.

adouglas · March 10th, 2014, 09:39 AM

He never asks which oil to use, which tires are best or what the right pressures are.

krolinked · March 10th, 2014, 09:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by adouglas

He never asks which oil to use, which tires are best or what the right pressures are.

-Win.

adouglas · March 10th, 2014, 05:48 PM

The layout of every track in the world is embedded in his genetic memory.

March 4th, 2014, 07:27 AM	#1
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	The most interesting rider in the world His knees have adjustable compression and rebound damping. He was ATGATT in the womb. His fingers are pre-curved. His skull is SNELL M2010, ECE 22.5 and DOT rated. He rolls the throttle on smoothly and continuously throughout the remainder of life. He achieves lean angles greater than 90 degrees. He convinced Harley-Davidson that V-twins are a bad idea. His knee pucks are worn down from the inside. His palms have Kevlar schaphoid protectors. His eyes are Pinlock-ready. His pajamas have a built-in Level 2 back protector. His motorcycle wheelies before he turns the key. When he lowsides, his bike stands back up out of respect. He counter-countersteers. His race number is divisible by zero. He can look through the turn he just completed. He warms his tires by breathing on them. His bike has a no-sided swingarm. The fly on his trousers is safety wired. Your turn.... __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.
	1 out of 1 members found this post helpful.

March 4th, 2014, 10:36 AM	#2
misfitsailor Ninjette Jockey Name: Tim Location: Stockton, Ca Join Date: Oct 2010 Motorcycle(s): Ninja 250R, Harley Davidson Heritage Softail, 2 Honda Monkeys, Polini & GRC mini GP Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 3	This sounds a lot like Chuck Norris to me... __________________________________________________ For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?.

March 4th, 2014, 11:42 AM	#3
alex.s wat Name: wat Location: tustin/long beach Join Date: Sep 2009 Motorcycle(s): wat Posts: Too much. Blog Entries: 5 MOTM - Oct '12, Feb '14	He rides side-saddle while smoking a pipe and reading a newspaper. Without cruise control. __________________________________________________

March 4th, 2014, 11:51 AM	#4
subxero dirty boy Name: Joe Location: Johnstown, PA Join Date: Sep 2012 Motorcycle(s): I don't even know anymore?? Posts: A lot. MOTM - Apr '14	He inadvertently invented the sport of motorcycle gymkhana one day when trying not to ride over any cracks in the road __________________________________________________ I love the smell of burning pre-mix in the morning I don't think I'm a lot dumber than you thought that I think that I thought I was once.
	1 out of 1 members found this post helpful.

March 4th, 2014, 12:01 PM	#5
alex.s wat Name: wat Location: tustin/long beach Join Date: Sep 2009 Motorcycle(s): wat Posts: Too much. Blog Entries: 5 MOTM - Oct '12, Feb '14	Once while he was smuggling gin, the police managed to pop two of his tires. not to be bested, he balanced the car on the remaining two wheels and completed the smuggle ahead of schedule. After seeing the effectiveness of two wheels, he invented the motorcycle. __________________________________________________

March 4th, 2014, 01:08 PM	#6
subxero dirty boy Name: Joe Location: Johnstown, PA Join Date: Sep 2012 Motorcycle(s): I don't even know anymore?? Posts: A lot. MOTM - Apr '14	He once entered a TT race as an Indie by mistake as he mistook it for a leisure group ride meet up he had signed up for. He went on to win on stock IRCs __________________________________________________ I love the smell of burning pre-mix in the morning I don't think I'm a lot dumber than you thought that I think that I thought I was once. Last futzed with by subxero; March 6th, 2014 at 09:24 AM.
	2 out of 2 members found this post helpful.

March 4th, 2014, 02:32 PM	#7
CC Cowboy ninjette.org certified postwhore Name: Whodat Location: Ware Is.,MA Join Date: Jan 2009 Motorcycle(s): I pass the wind! Posts: A lot. MOTM - Mar '13, Jun '14	I've seen that guy before. Isn't he from Vermont? __________________________________________________ If everything seems under control; you're just not going fast enough!

March 4th, 2014, 03:26 PM	#8
dcj13 Participant Name: Dave Location: South of Seattle Join Date: Oct 2012 Motorcycle(s): '94 K75 std Posts: Too much. MOTM - Aug '15	"I don't always ride bikes, but when I do, I prefer BMW."

March 4th, 2014, 04:29 PM	#9
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	He is so cool his leathers need no perforation. __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.
	2 out of 2 members found this post helpful.

March 4th, 2014, 05:39 PM	#10
Ducati999 ninjette.org certified postwhore Name: Ant Location: Wooster Join Date: Dec 2013 Motorcycle(s): Ducati 999 2012 Ninja 250r Ducati748 Yellow finally running 2003 SV650 S (SOLD) Posts: A lot.	He is the model they used for the guy on top of the first place trophy!

March 4th, 2014, 06:04 PM	#11
dcj13 Participant Name: Dave Location: South of Seattle Join Date: Oct 2012 Motorcycle(s): '94 K75 std Posts: Too much. MOTM - Aug '15	He kickstarts his bike with the flick of his wrist. Fun thread! The New Yorker magazine had an an interesting article about the guy 3 years ago (not the most interesting article in the world, mind you): He's just a nice, kind of funny jewish guy from New York (maybe it was New Jersey... Damn it! Can't remember).

March 4th, 2014, 07:40 PM	#12
misfitsailor Ninjette Jockey Name: Tim Location: Stockton, Ca Join Date: Oct 2010 Motorcycle(s): Ninja 250R, Harley Davidson Heritage Softail, 2 Honda Monkeys, Polini & GRC mini GP Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 3	In his spare time, he gives riding lessons to Keith Code. __________________________________________________ For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?.
	1 out of 1 members found this post helpful.

March 4th, 2014, 08:18 PM	#13
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	When he hangs off, it's with three butt cheeks. __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.

March 4th, 2014, 08:24 PM	#14
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	He won the Dakar. On a Hayabusa. __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.

March 4th, 2014, 08:25 PM	#15
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	He requires 150 octane. __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.

March 4th, 2014, 08:25 PM	#16
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	He flosses with safety wire. __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.
	1 out of 1 members found this post helpful.

March 4th, 2014, 08:26 PM	#17
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	Rossi calls him "The Doctor." __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.

March 4th, 2014, 10:56 PM	#18
rasta Your face Name: Wes Location: SF Bay Area Join Date: Jul 2013 Motorcycle(s): 2014 Honda CBR650f Posts: A lot.	He rides pillion...by himself He has never stalled a bike, but bikes have been too scared to move __________________________________________________ "even a proper fitting helmet can 'get loose'" -csmith
	1 out of 1 members found this post helpful.

March 5th, 2014, 10:10 AM	#19
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	The Isle of Man is named for him. __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.
	1 out of 1 members found this post helpful.

March 5th, 2014, 08:52 PM	#20
rasta Your face Name: Wes Location: SF Bay Area Join Date: Jul 2013 Motorcycle(s): 2014 Honda CBR650f Posts: A lot.	He really does wheelie to safety __________________________________________________ "even a proper fitting helmet can 'get loose'" -csmith
	1 out of 1 members found this post helpful.

March 6th, 2014, 05:59 AM	#21
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	The patch on his vest says 0.0000000000000000001% __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.
	1 out of 1 members found this post helpful.

March 6th, 2014, 08:40 AM	#22
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	His bicycle has a slipper clutch. __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.

March 6th, 2014, 08:49 AM	#23
Ducati999 ninjette.org certified postwhore Name: Ant Location: Wooster Join Date: Dec 2013 Motorcycle(s): Ducati 999 2012 Ninja 250r Ducati748 Yellow finally running 2003 SV650 S (SOLD) Posts: A lot.	He rode the Baja 1000 just for the time in the sun! Ducati named the Diavel after him

March 6th, 2014, 08:50 AM	#24
Ducati999 ninjette.org certified postwhore Name: Ant Location: Wooster Join Date: Dec 2013 Motorcycle(s): Ducati 999 2012 Ninja 250r Ducati748 Yellow finally running 2003 SV650 S (SOLD) Posts: A lot.	Even his underwear is carbon fibre
	1 out of 1 members found this post helpful.

March 6th, 2014, 08:59 AM	#25
Ducati999 ninjette.org certified postwhore Name: Ant Location: Wooster Join Date: Dec 2013 Motorcycle(s): Ducati 999 2012 Ninja 250r Ducati748 Yellow finally running 2003 SV650 S (SOLD) Posts: A lot.	In a race the pace car follows him

March 6th, 2014, 12:56 PM	#26
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	His burnouts are classified "five alarms." __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.

March 6th, 2014, 12:57 PM	#27
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	He carved the canyons in the first place. __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.

March 6th, 2014, 01:09 PM	#28
250rr ninjette.org certified postwhore Name: Mark Location: Portland Join Date: Sep 2010 Motorcycle(s): Cheap Italian Suit. Otherwise known as Dew Kitty Posts: A lot.	His cage is an actual cage.

March 6th, 2014, 01:22 PM	#29
subxero dirty boy Name: Joe Location: Johnstown, PA Join Date: Sep 2012 Motorcycle(s): I don't even know anymore?? Posts: A lot. MOTM - Apr '14	He won the 24hr Le Mans in 2 hours, 57 minutes and 33 seconds __________________________________________________ I love the smell of burning pre-mix in the morning I don't think I'm a lot dumber than you thought that I think that I thought I was once.

March 6th, 2014, 02:28 PM	#30
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	He is homologated. __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.

March 6th, 2014, 02:31 PM	#31
dcj13 Participant Name: Dave Location: South of Seattle Join Date: Oct 2012 Motorcycle(s): '94 K75 std Posts: Too much. MOTM - Aug '15	GPS asks him for directions.

March 8th, 2014, 06:21 AM	#32
adouglas Cat herder Name: Gort Location: A secret lair which, being secret, has an undisclosed location Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Aprilia RS660 Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 6 MOTM - Jul '18, Nov '16, Aug '14, May '13	He wins track days. __________________________________________________ I am NOT an adrenaline junkie, I'm a skill junkie. - csmith12 Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est. Heri historia. Cras mysterium. Hodie donum est. Carpe diem.

March 8th, 2014, 10:30 AM	#33
misfitsailor Ninjette Jockey Name: Tim Location: Stockton, Ca Join Date: Oct 2010 Motorcycle(s): Ninja 250R, Harley Davidson Heritage Softail, 2 Honda Monkeys, Polini & GRC mini GP Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 3	He can do a wheelie on a unicycle! __________________________________________________ For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?.

March 8th, 2014, 10:42 AM	#34
misfitsailor Ninjette Jockey Name: Tim Location: Stockton, Ca Join Date: Oct 2010 Motorcycle(s): Ninja 250R, Harley Davidson Heritage Softail, 2 Honda Monkeys, Polini & GRC mini GP Posts: A lot. Blog Entries: 3	When he races he doesn't win, he just allows you to lose. __________________________________________________ For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?.
	2 out of 2 members found this post helpful.

March 8th, 2014, 03:50 PM	#36
Ducati999 ninjette.org certified postwhore Name: Ant Location: Wooster Join Date: Dec 2013 Motorcycle(s): Ducati 999 2012 Ninja 250r Ducati748 Yellow finally running 2003 SV650 S (SOLD) Posts: A lot.	He uses his own skin for Leathers Last futzed with by Ducati999; March 8th, 2014 at 03:51 PM. Reason: mis spelling