June 26th, 2009, 12:31 PM | #1 |
ninjette.org sage
Name: Tin
Location: NJ
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): 08 black 250r (sold); '09 black zx6r Posts: 903
|
Should I or Should I Not..That is the Question.
My girl friend needs financial help. Wait.. She's not my GF. A female friend I should've said. Anyways, I am thinking of selling my bike to help her out because she has always been there and helped me many times in the pass. Before I went out to shop for a bike I did ask her if she needed help and she told me no so I went out and bought a bike. I think it's time for me to be a little unselfish and sell my bike. What do you think?
|
|
June 26th, 2009, 12:32 PM | #2 |
ninjette.org certified postwhore
Name: Kim
Location: mundo de ensueño
Join Date: Nov 2008 Motorcycle(s): '08 250 Posts: A lot.
|
You're crazy. There are far better ways to help her out. You'll never see the money again, likely lose a friend in the process, and you'll always be bitter about losingthe bike because of it
__________________________________________________
Progrip tank pad, blue rim stripes, blue Pazzos, Roaring Toyz lowering kit, Puig DB in dark smoke, Cortech sport tail, super mini tank, and saddlebags, OES swingarm spools and Intuitive frame sliders |
|
June 26th, 2009, 12:39 PM | #3 |
ninjette.org sage
Name: Tin
Location: NJ
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): 08 black 250r (sold); '09 black zx6r Posts: 903
|
If I sell the bike to help her I will not expect her to pay me back. She has helped me financially more than once and never expected me to pay a penny back.
We are like siblings. |
|
June 26th, 2009, 12:40 PM | #4 |
ninjette.org member
Name: Lisa
Location: DFW
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): 09 Ninja 250 Posts: 184
|
It depends on what the financial help is going to be used for. In my opinion it seems like a drastic thing to do in order to help someone you aren't in a committed relationship with.
|
|
June 26th, 2009, 12:44 PM | #5 |
Giggity Giggity
Name: Ryam
Location: San Diego
Join Date: Feb 2009 Motorcycle(s): 08 ninja 250R aka Hiryu Posts: 481
|
your only the one that knows if she deserves it or not and who cares what we say or think...
__________________________________________________
Facebook DY Fender chop, Danmoto CB slip-on w/baffle, Airbox removed, Kleen-air removed, shimmed needles, Mikuni #117.5 Main jets, K&N RU-1822 air filter pods |
|
June 26th, 2009, 12:56 PM | #6 | |
ninjette.org sage
Name: Tin
Location: NJ
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): 08 black 250r (sold); '09 black zx6r Posts: 903
|
Quote:
We, human, don't think straight or have a clear view of what we're doing when we're in the spot light. Sometimes, the outsiders have a better view. |
|
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:02 PM | #7 |
ninjette.org member
Name: bogdan
Location: Sofia, Bulgaria
Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Kawasaki Z750 Posts: 244
|
Never hesitate to give a hand to someone who deserve it !
__________________________________________________
Please, excuse my English, I am a foreigner, we even do not use the same alphabet around here. |
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:04 PM | #8 |
Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: Too much.
|
I wouldn't. Sounds like if you need to sell the bike to help her with a small amount of money, you're in no financial position to help her yourself.
If you really want to help her, consider co signing a loan for her. If you both don't have enough credit history to complete that, are you sure you want to be mixed up with her financially? friends and borrowing money usually don't mix well. There are much better ways to support friends than to help them financially. may I ask what she needs the money for? |
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:05 PM | #9 |
Giggity Giggity
Name: Ryam
Location: San Diego
Join Date: Feb 2009 Motorcycle(s): 08 ninja 250R aka Hiryu Posts: 481
|
I agree about asking an opinion from another but make sure they can make a decision based on what they know about the person also.
__________________________________________________
Facebook DY Fender chop, Danmoto CB slip-on w/baffle, Airbox removed, Kleen-air removed, shimmed needles, Mikuni #117.5 Main jets, K&N RU-1822 air filter pods |
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:06 PM | #10 |
ninjette.org guru
Name: Deb
Location: Philly
Join Date: Dec 2008 Motorcycle(s): '09 ninja 250 (blue) Posts: 295
|
So............would you do this for your brother or sister??? I would. You say she's like a sister and has helped you more than once. If there is NO other way for your to help her financially than selling your bike...........well, bro, you know in your heart what the right thing to do is. Family is once in a lifetime; bikes come and go.
__________________________________________________
A woman is like a teabag; you never know how strong she is until she's in hot water! |
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:17 PM | #11 |
Psychic war veteran
Name: Thomas
Location: Norfolk, VA
Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): Kawi Green '09 Ninja ZX6R Posts: 663
|
.....this can only end badly.
__________________________________________________
* If you're arguing with some idiot over the internet, chances are pretty good he's doing the same thing! Zodiac Mindwarp and the Love Reaction |
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:17 PM | #12 |
ninjette.org certified postwhore
Name: Travis
Location: Warwick, RI
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): 2009 Ninja 250R Posts: A lot.
|
Material things come and go. I'd say it really depends on how much you value her and how much she really needs it. Also it depends on why she needs it.
__________________________________________________
Addicted to anything that has an engine and rolls. |
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:22 PM | #13 |
ninjette.org certified postwhore
Name: Whodat
Location: Ware Is.,MA
Join Date: Jan 2009 Motorcycle(s): I pass the wind! Posts: A lot.
MOTM - Mar '13, Jun '14
|
Look at it this way. If you sell your bike and give her the money she won' be a friend any more (never lend a friend money).
Is she a friend with benefits? That way you're just paying for them benefits. How much does she need? Is it more or less the same amount of benefits. If it is more she still owes you some future benefits. If it is less, then call it even.
__________________________________________________
If everything seems under control; you're just not going fast enough! |
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:24 PM | #14 |
ninjette.org guru
Name: Deb
Location: Philly
Join Date: Dec 2008 Motorcycle(s): '09 ninja 250 (blue) Posts: 295
|
Read people.
__________________________________________________
A woman is like a teabag; you never know how strong she is until she's in hot water! |
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:31 PM | #15 |
Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: Too much.
|
uh... even he can't tell if this girl is his GF or not. if they are friends w/ benefits, how can she be like a sibling? He needs to think with his head... not his head.
we can read... I just think there is more to this and I am reading ... between the lines. |
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:34 PM | #16 |
ninjette.org member
Name: Dario
Location: Suffolk County, NY
Join Date: Jan 2009 Motorcycle(s): 2015 Ninja 300 (Sold), 2016 Z1000 Posts: 239
|
|
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:45 PM | #17 |
ninjette.org guru
Name: Deb
Location: Philly
Join Date: Dec 2008 Motorcycle(s): '09 ninja 250 (blue) Posts: 295
|
uh... even he can't tell if this girl is his GF or not.
Nooooooo; he didn't say that (or Ididn't read it that way). He said she is his girl friend (notice the separation between the two words). I was thinking that he added the clarifier (Wait....she's not my GF) for a clearer understanding on our part. Does that make sense?
__________________________________________________
A woman is like a teabag; you never know how strong she is until she's in hot water! |
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:52 PM | #18 |
IC2(SW)
Name: Kerry
Location: Pensacola
Join Date: Nov 2008 Motorcycle(s): . Posts: A lot.
|
Get some sleep, get off the drugs!
|
|
June 26th, 2009, 01:56 PM | #19 |
ninjette.org guru
Name: Deb
Location: Philly
Join Date: Dec 2008 Motorcycle(s): '09 ninja 250 (blue) Posts: 295
|
__________________________________________________
A woman is like a teabag; you never know how strong she is until she's in hot water! |
|
June 26th, 2009, 02:50 PM | #20 |
ninjette.org Monkey Spank
Name: Kevin
Location: Illinois
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): 2008 250R Track-Bike Woodcraft clip-ons and rearsets FZ-6 track bike Posts: A lot.
|
financial advice lol How much do you think you have borrowed and not paid back? Is she requesting more of less than that amount? How can you help her if you have to sell your bike to give her the money? My advice would be to get a part time job for cash and give her the proceeds (mow lawns or something) until your debt is repaid. You know how much you owe her. Make it square. Friends come and go. Its a fact of life. If she isnt your gf do you think when she gets married to another guy that you are going to remain close? Clear your debt with her any way you see fit. Whatever you do, DO NOT have this equasion turned the other way because you will never see the money. I hate it when others owe me money. I have lost more than a few friends over money. Make your peace with her by making things all square again and you will sleep well at night.
__________________________________________________
Black 250R Full Area P QC Dyno Jet Kit 100 main 41T Rear Sprocket |
|
June 26th, 2009, 03:00 PM | #21 |
ninjette.org sage
Name: Tin
Location: NJ
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): 08 black 250r (sold); '09 black zx6r Posts: 903
|
Thanks everyone for your honest opinions.
Let me fill in some more details. She's a single mom with 2 boys. Since the summer is here she decided to enroll them into a summer program because she doesn't have anyone to look after them. The cost per kid is about 3k. She had no choice and took a gamble. She enrolled them and paid the first installment. The 2nd is due next month and she will not have the money to pay for them. She didn't come to me and ask me for the money. We were talking and I asked about the kids so she told me her situation. I have 3 options. 1. sell my bike 2. use my saving 3. borrow from my 401k I think selling my bike is the best option and here's why. My bike, just like everything else I've owned, depreciates over time. Saving grows over time. Same goes for 401k (may not be true for everyone but mine is growing at a minimal rate). If I use my saving: What if I lose my job. Although my job is secure, however, you'll never know. In today's economic crisis anything is possible. I will have 2 options if I lose my job. Sell my bike or use 401k. My bike wouldn't worth as much as it would now. If I use the 401k I will still have to make monthly payment + interest. The interest doesn't really matter cuz it will accumulate into my acct. But how will I be able make monthly payment toward 401k on top of everything else if I don't have a job. If I use my 401k: I already have payments that I need to make every month. I don't want to tag on another. I will also have to pay a panalty. Plus I want to use it to make a down payment on a house in a few years. If I sell my bike: The bike is something extra that I don't really need. Eventhough I enjoy riding and learning about it I really don't need it. It's not like I need it to get to work or around town. I can get the most for the bike if I sell it now. I can always get another in a year or so. The worst part is no riding this summer. I will also have the saving to fall back on. If I lose my job I can probably live off the saving before I find another job. I also have another option. I doubt that I will excercise this option because time is running out. If my bro has side jobs I can make extra money working with him. I think I know what I have to do. I just wanted to hear what your thoughts are. It's always good to hear from others. Oh. Thanks Deb for clarifying. She's not a girlfriend. She's like a sister (how's that?) Thanks again. |
|
June 26th, 2009, 03:05 PM | #22 |
Professional belly dancer
Name: James
Location: Toronto
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): 1992 GSX-R 750 Posts: A lot.
|
Depends. Is she specifically asking you for money or are you simply volunteering to give her money? How dire is her need for this financial help? Will mobster come to her house and take her fingers if she doesn't pay?
To be honest, I wouldn't do this....not even for my family....not unless I knew exactly what they were getting into, and exactly how they'd be using this money to get out of it. You could very easily get pulled into her mess and end up in a financial quagmire yourself. If shes asking for it....then you have to ask yourself: would someone that actually cared about you put you in a position like this? In the end its your decision, but be careful. |
|
June 26th, 2009, 03:07 PM | #23 | |
ninjette.org sage
Name: Tin
Location: NJ
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): 08 black 250r (sold); '09 black zx6r Posts: 903
|
Quote:
|
|
|
June 26th, 2009, 03:15 PM | #24 |
IC2(SW)
Name: Kerry
Location: Pensacola
Join Date: Nov 2008 Motorcycle(s): . Posts: A lot.
|
People that have kids, and cant take care of them.... freaking crack me up!
|
|
June 26th, 2009, 03:21 PM | #25 | |
Professional belly dancer
Name: James
Location: Toronto
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): 1992 GSX-R 750 Posts: A lot.
|
Quote:
|
|
|
June 26th, 2009, 03:47 PM | #26 |
ninjette.org certified postwhore
Name: addy126
Location: Tx
Join Date: May 2009 Motorcycle(s): '09 Kawasaki N-250 + '09 Vulcan 900 Classic Lt Posts: A lot.
|
Don't you watch any of "Judge Judy"???!!!!!! Its a recipe for disaster all way round!... You are taking this on like it is your family and responsibility... help is one thing I'd be payin her back what you've taken from her.. but more than that... ohhhhh no my friend keep that bike at least its a guarantee.. the other presents none.
|
|
June 26th, 2009, 04:00 PM | #27 |
ninjette.org Monkey Spank
Name: Kevin
Location: Illinois
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): 2008 250R Track-Bike Woodcraft clip-ons and rearsets FZ-6 track bike Posts: A lot.
|
Sell the bike and loan me $1000 I have 2 kids and they need day care yada yada yada. I could ask my mom to watch them during the day, but this guy has a motorcycle that he will sell. I havent even asked him for the money but he thinks im HOT and hes stupid enough to give it to me.
Hope this isnt you DUDE Good luck.
__________________________________________________
Black 250R Full Area P QC Dyno Jet Kit 100 main 41T Rear Sprocket |
|
June 26th, 2009, 05:40 PM | #28 | |
ninjette.org guru
Name: Purspeed
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Join Date: Nov 2008 Motorcycle(s): 2007 Ninja 250 Posts: 469
|
Quote:
Also, only give money that you have. Try working an extra job and giving her that, provided that it is not an emergency.
__________________________________________________
"This is my Ninja. There are many like it, but this one is mine..." ~ Purspeed (ca. Nov, 2008) |
|
|
June 26th, 2009, 05:51 PM | #29 |
ninjette.org certified postwhore
Name: Kim
Location: mundo de ensueño
Join Date: Nov 2008 Motorcycle(s): '08 250 Posts: A lot.
|
or help her find a more reasonably priced child care solution - like the teenage girl down the street who doesn't have a summer job because college grads are forced to work at McDonald's now
__________________________________________________
Progrip tank pad, blue rim stripes, blue Pazzos, Roaring Toyz lowering kit, Puig DB in dark smoke, Cortech sport tail, super mini tank, and saddlebags, OES swingarm spools and Intuitive frame sliders |
|
June 26th, 2009, 06:11 PM | #30 |
motorcycle rider
Name: Bruce
Location: Victoria, BC
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): '14 Yamaha V-Star 650 Custom (silver) Posts: A lot.
|
__________________________________________________
'14 Yamaha V-Star 650 Custom (silver) |
|
June 26th, 2009, 07:41 PM | #31 |
Green!
Name: Tyler
Location: S. Florida
Join Date: Nov 2008 Motorcycle(s): 08 Ninja 250R, 04 Honda CRF230F, 94 Honda XR80R Posts: 505
|
Only you can really determine the situation. The majority of people are extremely possessive over money (it's our way of life, you can;t blame them), so your going to get a lot of negative responses.
Personally, me and my friends give each other money all the time. I've paid a few thousand for a friend to be able to go on a trip with us one time when he was doing really bad financially. He a good friend that I have known a long time, and for me that's what friends do for each other. Over the past few years I have just made him pick up my tab at the bar. Is it even? No, not even close, but whatever, he's a friend and it's only money, I'll earn more. It all depends how you feel and how good of a friend you think she really is. I have 2-3 friends I would do it for (given that the money isn't being used stupidly).
__________________________________________________
2008 Green 250R |
|
June 26th, 2009, 08:06 PM | #32 | ||
Sarcasm: Yea that'll work
Name: Andy
Location: Essex Jct, VT
Join Date: Dec 2008 Motorcycle(s): '08 Ninja 250R Posts: 330
|
Quote:
Quote:
I know a coworker, single mother, 3 kids, works part time, and gets by fine without needing help. Like noche said, find her a cheaper babysitting service. I hate to pull out a quote on this one, but the only things worse than favors are favors involving money.
__________________________________________________
'08 Blue - Seat Cowl - A-Tech CF Fender Elim - Zartan's Exhaust Hanger - Dynojet Kit - Drilled Slides - Snorkel Removed - K&N Drop In Air Filter - Tech Spec Grips - Sportisi Windscreen & VR Exhaust |
||
|
June 27th, 2009, 12:28 AM | #33 |
ninjette.org guru
Name: Nick
Location: Sacramento, California.
Join Date: Apr 2009 Motorcycle(s): 2009 Ninja 250r Posts: 379
|
How old are these boys? 3k each? Doesn't your state have some type of program that helps pay a portion of childcare if all legal guardians work full time?
I wouldn't do it. Offer to help her find some cheaper childcare and if at that point its still a little too much money you can probably help her out without selling your bike/dipping in 401k (bad)/touching savings (also bad) Its all up to you though. |
|
June 27th, 2009, 12:44 AM | #34 |
ninjette.org certified postwhore
Name: zartan
Location: spam la
Join Date: Oct 2008 Motorcycle(s): 08 250 R Posts: A lot.
|
No question about helping out someone.,that is a given yes but..
Never sell a bike for money -- unless your kid or spouse is in the hospital or sick I repeat never sell a bike for money. You will have pissed your bike away and then be bitter. TRUST ME on this one. If you want to help then pull savings or get some extra work.
__________________________________________________
"Don't let adverse facts stand in the way of a good decision" Colin Powell |
|
June 27th, 2009, 12:45 AM | #35 |
Frak It
Name: Sean
Location: SWFL
Join Date: Dec 2008 Motorcycle(s): 2008 Ninja 250R Posts: 199
|
Hell no.
|
|
June 27th, 2009, 09:19 AM | #36 |
dirty old man
Name: Chris
Location: Hazel Green, AL
Join Date: Nov 2008 Motorcycle(s): Blue '08 Ninja 250 Posts: A lot.
Blog Entries: 1
|
Hmmmm
Ok, I have seen for and against here. My .
You said she is a friend that has helped you out in the past. She sounds like a really good friend and those are hard to find. A saying I heard in the past, you pick your friends, you don't pick your family. The way I am reading, she has not asked and you are offering to help, you are not expecting to be paid back. I hate to say it like this, but, your call. I think you already know the answer and you just want confirmation that you are making the right decision and you value other opinions. Once you decide, you will know if it was right, whether or not you regret it. My wife is fond of saying let fate decide, post it on CL and see how you feel when you get an offer. If you have a feeling of extreme regret then you have your answer. You can always reject the offer and pull the ad. What would I do? Can't say, never been in that situation. (in response to a previous post) As far as a single lady with 2 kids and can't afford them, it has happened before and will happen again, happy couple gets married, happy couple has kids, mom stays home and raises kids instead of having them raised by a nursery, daddy is not so happy cause momma has had 2 kids and is not as attractive as the sexy young lady that he met on the business trip to Argentina. (I grew up in SC, and still a resident/registered voter, so I am allowed to make fun of this one) Dad leaves mom and the kids and only gives the alimony/child support that the court has told him while he wines, dines and woos the sexy young lady. nb
__________________________________________________
Death tugs at my ear and says, "Live, I am coming." -Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr., poet, novelist, essayist, and physician (1809-1894) www.friendsofsanonofre.org |
|
June 27th, 2009, 10:01 AM | #37 |
Frak It
Name: Sean
Location: SWFL
Join Date: Dec 2008 Motorcycle(s): 2008 Ninja 250R Posts: 199
|
I wonder what the OP will sell next summer?
|
|
June 27th, 2009, 05:34 PM | #38 |
ninjette.org certified postwhore
Name: Whodat
Location: Ware Is.,MA
Join Date: Jan 2009 Motorcycle(s): I pass the wind! Posts: A lot.
MOTM - Mar '13, Jun '14
|
Dear Forum,
I'm feeling a little light in the wallet do to excessive spending on myself. If I could ask all of you to help support me until Obama can get me on the govenment bandwagon it would be nice. Although I won't be anyones girl friend, that is unless there is jail time in my future, I will be your friend and still make fun of all of you on the forum. I'm not asking for much (from each of you) but I believe that collectively this forum's membership could support me in a rather fashionable life style. This is not like my birthday (where you guys really didn't accomplish the desired goals). This is for life. Besides, I have two kids that want everything imaginable. Think how you could help them too. I'm not going to pay anyone back however; if you want me to lie and deceive you I will be happy to tell you I will just to make everyone feel satisfied. The beginning of the month is this coming week and the bills will be coming in so lets not dillydally about the funds. Sincerely, O.A.
__________________________________________________
If everything seems under control; you're just not going fast enough! |
|
June 30th, 2009, 02:56 PM | #39 |
ninjette.org certified postwhore
Name: Rick
Location: Alexandria, Louisiana
Join Date: Jan 2009 Motorcycle(s): 05 Blue Ninja 250 Posts: Too much.
MOTY - 2017, MOTM - Jan '19, Oct '16, May '14
|
O.A. you have a great way of putting things into prespective.
|
|
June 30th, 2009, 07:18 PM | #40 |
ninjette.org certified postwhore
Name: Lil One
Location: NB Canada
Join Date: Mar 2009 Motorcycle(s): '09 Ninja 250 Black Posts: A lot.
|
Do what feels right in your heart. Ask yourself can you live with the decision you make?
__________________________________________________
I'm not small, I'm fun sized |
|
Similar Threads | ||||
Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
Question | ruby1025 | 1986 - 2007 Ninja 250R Tech Talk | 6 | July 22nd, 2014 10:36 PM |
If you could ask ONE question..... | Misti | General Motorcycling Discussion | 36 | March 31st, 2014 11:18 AM |
A Question and thanks | Ducati999 | Motorcycle Gear | 11 | March 20th, 2014 07:02 AM |
English 10 Language Question (Very simple question) | nickjpass | Off-Topic | 24 | September 16th, 2011 08:28 AM |
Question about | JeffM | General Motorcycling Discussion | 16 | April 16th, 2010 07:56 PM |
|
|