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Old July 8th, 2013, 04:48 PM   #121
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Old July 8th, 2013, 05:03 PM   #122
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Old July 8th, 2013, 06:50 PM   #123
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Haha thanks

Guys, Canada ****ing eats ****.

More on this story later tonight
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Old July 8th, 2013, 10:29 PM   #124
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Day 14, it's Canada time!

First off, **** Canada. Yea I said it, **** your leafy flag, **** your understaffed business, **** your unending miles of traffic, **** your bitch ass rain, **** your pussy ass lightning storms, **** your faggoty power grids, **** your $3 toll, **** your one and two dollar coins, **** your couch *****.

Alright, so first off I went to the bmw place and got my schuberth replaced like I said earlier. That was the highlight of the trip. Then we went to sportbiketrackgear's actual shop. It's not as big as you'd think but they are expanding soon. Got a gift there and then we headed for the border. There was thunder and lightning and it was pretty ****ing cool. We got gas at a gas station before the border because those uppity Canadians like to charge per liter instead of per gallon so you end up paying more. What a stupid idea, liters are for cola you douches.

We go to cross the border and it starts pouring and we were getting soaked. I went through the inspection and handed over my passport and got the green light. Lol they didn't find any of my drugs bahahaha. We went to the currency exchange and put rain gear on. It was still ****ing pouring. Then I got $100 in Canadian money. I guess it's not like Mexico where they accept free American dollars, you have to have socialist money. So I got two fifties out of the machine. These flimsy ass bills felt very fragile compared to my robust and rugged American dollars.

Anyway, we got onto the Canadian highways which are limited to 100 kilometers per hour. What the **** are those anyway? Canadians must be really bad drivers which is why the speed limits are so low. We ride for a long as time and get to Toronto and Mississauga, holy ****, Canadian ass packing traffic. It's big, it's bad, and it's Canadian. This **** was backed up for miles. So what do the Canadians decide to do? They pull uturns on the highway and go backwards to the exit. What a buncha ****ing ****tards. Why the **** would you do that Canada? So we couldn't get onto this highway cuz the dumb ****sticks going backwards were blocking it so we exit and did surface streets.

Holy **** what a mess. Lights are out and these damn Canadians dunno wtf to do! Treat it like a stop sign you leaf smoking homos, this isn't ****ing Mexico, you are better than that, not by much but a mild margin is better than nothing. Traffic was a bitch. People were even offroading to get off the highway. Uncle ****ers.

We didn't know if lane splitting was legal so I called my Gf via the Rogers network, what a stupid ****ing name for cell service, and asked her to find out. I figured since California and England allow lane splitting and both those places are pretty gay then for sure As gay as Canada is that it would be legal. And it is! So we lane split for a good bit and stopped at an A&W to recalculate. I ordered a burger and fries. It took about 30 Minutes from the moment I walked in to get my food and it wasn't even that busy. They had 2 workers, that's it. Wtf Canada, get some goddamn burger flippers or is the min wage so high you can only afford two!? ****

Then we headed to the hotel. That only took ****ing forever thanks to the ****ing traffic. God I ****ing hate traffic! It was so ****ing bad my bike started overheating IN THE UNCLE ****ING RAIN!!! Holy **** Canada, suck more? Like 5 Canadian hours later we got to the hotel. It was too late to go get food where we wanted so we ate at the hotel. The great North American grill or some **** is what it was called. There was like 2 waiters, one chef and one bar tender. And like ****, 100 customers? There was no hostess. We had to go to a waiter and ask where the **** do we sit. We sat. He didn't come by for our orders for ever so I went to the bar to get beer. What a ****** selection. Jesus ****, step your game up Canada. Got a beer which took a while and went back to the table. Ordered a burger, can't **** that up right Canada?

Wrong. Apparently Canadian cows are meatless pussies so they ran the **** out of burgers. How the **** do you run out of burgers!? I ordered fish and chips, don't **** this **** up bitch. I finished my beer before the food came so I waited for like 10-15 Canadian minutes, and went and got another beer. Wouldn't you know all the draft was out. How the **** do you run out... Oh wait we've been over this. ****ers... The Canadian beer wasn't very good either. I got Blue, it was meh.

Finally after 1.5 beers, the food came. It was warm, not hot. Upsetting.... The meal was ok. Went back to the room to dry all the Canadian rain out of my gear with a tiny Canadian hair dryer. I started that 3 hours ago, my gloves are almost dry. Found out that the pussy ass lightning storm knocked out power in 80% of Toronto and Mississauga. Wow Canada, way to ****ing fail at life. Also their trains flooded. Bahahaha, pansies.

We did have plans to go into Toronto tomorrow but **** it, this place sucks. Canada can suck on my balls and die.

Average mpg today was 56, pretty legit
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Old July 8th, 2013, 11:10 PM   #125
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Holy **** that was the funniest thing I've read in awhile.
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Old July 9th, 2013, 04:36 AM   #126
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Holy **** they got jug handles on the freeway...

I'd like to slap whoever designed that
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Old July 9th, 2013, 07:16 AM   #127
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Old July 9th, 2013, 08:00 AM   #128
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Old July 9th, 2013, 08:40 AM   #129
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whats a canadian hour? 1.5 US ones?
your times would make sense if true, lol.
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Old July 9th, 2013, 09:46 AM   #130
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my bike started overheating IN THE UNCLE ****ING RAIN!!!
hahah the uncle rain
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Old July 9th, 2013, 10:22 AM   #131
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Typical American. Blame Canada.
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Old July 9th, 2013, 11:58 AM   #132
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Typical American. Blame Canada.
well he is IN Canada...

Maybe they were just discriminating against him for being southern
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Old July 9th, 2013, 01:02 PM   #133
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Here's what happened in Toronto

http://m.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-23236921
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Old July 9th, 2013, 01:34 PM   #134
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Old July 9th, 2013, 01:48 PM   #135
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Here's what happened in Toronto
http://m.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-23236921
a little rain doesn't excuse the lack of quality alcoholic beverages...
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Old July 9th, 2013, 02:22 PM   #136
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that was the most colorful description of canada I've ever heard!
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Old July 9th, 2013, 07:23 PM   #137
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Today I rode around 200ish miles with no hands. 120miles of that was constant no bar input! Crazy hahahahaha
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Old July 9th, 2013, 07:26 PM   #138
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Here's what happened in Toronto

http://m.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-23236921
No wonder they are all here in Florida !!!!

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Today I rode around 200ish miles with no hands. 120miles of that was constant no bar input! Crazy hahahahaha
What is wrong with your hands ?????
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Old July 9th, 2013, 08:01 PM   #139
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What is wrong with your hands ?????
I got tired of using them so I went hand less and just used my body weight and air resistance to steer. It was fun. I had music playing that I danced to and a car full of girls drive by and took pics hahahah
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Old July 9th, 2013, 08:01 PM   #140
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It's one way to make the freeway not suck. I almost considered driving with my feet
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Old July 9th, 2013, 08:16 PM   #141
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It's one way to make the freeway not suck. I almost considered driving with my feet
That is what cruise control is for !!!

What is going on with Brian???
You or him don't talk much about him and his tribulations
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Old July 9th, 2013, 08:33 PM   #142
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That is what cruise control is for !!!

What is going on with Brian???
You or him don't talk much about him and his tribulations
He means use his legs/feet for air resistance to steer. I wish I had a camera today. Watching him dance was hilarious!!!! It's almost like MJ's Thriller music video.

Meh I'm lazy to jot down my thoughts. Most evenings when Sean's blogging, I'm trying to figure out the arrangments for the next day. Hotels, breakfast, lunch, dinner, and the routes along w/ calculations for whoever ended up paying the bills for the day. No big deal. Just that after, I eat, get food coma, and then wanna watch tv till I hit the sack. I gotta say though, Sean's got the situation spot on most of the time since we're using the intercom and discussing things all the time as we ride.
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Old July 9th, 2013, 08:59 PM   #143
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.......... I gotta say though, Sean's got the situation spot on most of the time since we're using the intercom and discussing things all the time as we ride.
It seems that you guys are having a blast !!!

Come back to USA !!!
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Old July 9th, 2013, 09:19 PM   #144
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We're in the USA! Canada was terrible
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Old July 9th, 2013, 09:40 PM   #145
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Day I don't know anymore.

We had a long day ahead of us, Toronto to Albany New York, 400ish miles. We decided to go to the Canadian side of Niagara falls. So we left the hotel and went to get gas. Now considering Canada's ****ups so far this can't go right, right? Right, the gas station was out of gas. The mother ****ing gas station ain't got no mother ****ing gas!! How is this even possible, well let me tell you how. For one, the gas station was located in Canada. That's about it. Stupid.

So we get gas, ERH EXCUSE ME, petrol, ****, and head out. It was like a hundredish miles out from where we were to Niagara Falls. We got there and we're pretty hungry so we took some pics and got some Canada fast food. Can't **** that up right Canada? So close to the border you can't possibly do wrong right? Well my Tim hortons burger was about 50% meat 50% open space. Sigh. At least they had beer, that's neat.

We crossed the border and went to a wing place, duffs I believe, it was pretty damn good. Then headed off to Albany. I practiced no handed steering some more and after a hundred miles we pulled off to get gas and put on rain gear since we got hit by a big ass rain cloud. I bought a monster at the stop for $4.50, I have a problem, I can admit that. Rain gear on and gas filled up we headed out and I began my 200mi journey of no hands.

For this stint I probably did about 150-160 miles no hands with 120mi straight no hands. It was ****ing fun. I blasted music and danced the whole way, people in cars were like Dafuq is this ***** doing. Some bitches took pics too.

We got to Brian's uncles house with about 16 range left on my bike. That means essentially I've got a bought .25 gallons left, so I just barely made it. We did 200mi no stops, I'm impressed that I can do that. Dinner was some reheated food, it was pretty good.

Alright tomorrow is the last day of the trip! It's gna be a total of over 4,500 miles and a few kilometers.
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Old July 9th, 2013, 09:58 PM   #146
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So you didn't like Canada then?
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Old July 10th, 2013, 03:27 AM   #147
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Old July 10th, 2013, 04:48 AM   #148
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Old July 10th, 2013, 04:53 AM   #149
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Old July 10th, 2013, 05:29 AM   #150
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Alright tomorrow is the last day of the trip! It's gna be a total of over 4,500 miles and a few kilometers.
That's amazing... Sounds like its been one hell of an adventurer. especially that run through Canadian....
You guys riding home too, or renting a truck?
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Old July 10th, 2013, 05:52 AM   #151
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Flying back. I'd ride if I could but I don't have time
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Old July 10th, 2013, 06:09 AM   #152
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Old July 10th, 2013, 06:15 AM   #153
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What about the bikes? Carry on?
I didn't think of that, you want it?
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Old July 10th, 2013, 06:25 AM   #154
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Let me save you some hassle.

I'll pick up your ticket in exchange for the beemer.
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Old July 10th, 2013, 06:31 AM   #155
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Originally Posted by Jiggles View Post
I didn't think of that, you want it?
Sure, do i have to pick it up or will you deliver? Hahaha
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Old July 10th, 2013, 06:40 AM   #156
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MOTM - Apr '13
Yea sure, delivery charge of $12,000
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Old July 10th, 2013, 06:41 AM   #157
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Take checks?
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Old July 10th, 2013, 07:04 AM   #158
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MOTM - Apr '13
Fa sho
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Old July 10th, 2013, 08:30 AM   #159
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Sweet
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Old July 10th, 2013, 12:17 PM   #160
aeroblade
Doh!
 
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lol post dated, year 2135....
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